Today, my sister was taking forever in the bathroom, and I jokingly threatened to kick down the door. I rammed into it, and it actually bust almost off its hinges. My sister screamed and our parents came running. Now I'm grounded forever and our bathroom has no door. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
Today, I was standing in the shower drying off when my sister came in the bathroom. She must have thought I was a burglar because she hit the shower curtain and punched me in the face. FML
Today, my sister kicked me in the balls just before I went into the bathroom, as she wanted to use the shower first. Later, when I came out of the bathroom, she kneed me this time in the same spot because apparently I always make a mess in the bathroom. FML
Today, I decided to scare my 10 year old sister for fun. I hid behind a door and leapt out, shouting "Boo!" when she walked by. She burst into tears and ran screaming to my mom. My mom thought I'd hit my sister, and was so angry that she punched me in the eye. FML
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Today, my sister snuck into the bathroom while I was in the shower (the lock is broken) and took my clothes and towels. I came out and quickly went to my room. As I went in, my sister was sitting on my bed with two friends watching TV. I instantly covered up, but they saw everything. FML
Today, I woke up to a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I jumped out of bed in panic and rushed into the bathroom, only to see my sister limping around in the nude. She'd just jumped out of the shower because someone had flushed the toilet downstairs. FML
Today, my sister smashed a cup on my head because I told her she couldn't borrow one of my necklaces since she lost one and stole another. I was grounded for "antagonizing" her into doing it. FML
Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML
Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell, and hit my head on the faucet. FML
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Top comments
challan 19
Your sister hasn't orgasms in three months! Give her some time, gees!
NotGabe 28
Really, what did you expect to happen? You don't exactly bounce off a door if you're ramming it.
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Comments (83)
mrfuzzywiggles 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Your a dumbass
olpally 33
You're a dumb ass too... ;)
Sports_guy3 28
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Sorry for calling Captain Obvious, but #1- it's "you're"
fuckyourlifeOP 25
Oh, such irony.
Ambient25 25
Mah momma, she sez I is smarted
Warm_Apple_Pie 21
*with obvious sarcasm* That was the most perfect English I've ever heard!
ziya1999 12
#23, I can related. The grammer nazi dies a little bit every time someone can get the difference between 'your' and 'you're'.
thrlyrist 6
Bad grammar (and spelling) makes me sic too
Sports_guy3 28
*facepalms himself* Whoa, sorry about that. Grammar Nazi was taking over there.
RinkuTheHero 13
bogs pls.
yeezuschrist420 11
You’re a ********
challan 19
Your sister hasn't orgasms in three months! Give her some time, gees!
eyepuppy 31
haha. always great to reference another fml!
challan 19
orgasmed* Foiled once again by auto correct!
HopelesslyCiara5 19
They give you enough time to edit the comment.. ;) 2 minutes to be exact!
JMichael 26
Haha, he was just trying to make sure she could actually do it. But guess that failed lol.
incoherentrmblr 22
Have fun taking a sh**...
Looneytune31 4
Hahahha that... That is good
mpkpm 19
Are you an idiot?!
Sports_guy3 28
*cough*yesheis*cough*. I need some cough drops.
Warm_Apple_Pie 21
LOL XD
ziya1999 12
No shit. of course he's an idiot.
happyevil 10
Well when you gotta go, you gotta go...
xx000o 27
There's always the kitchen sink if you really have to go that bad.
onlychildFTW 34
No there isn't #50
SushiSashi 8
Would YOU use the kitchen sink?
arsenicalhumor 30
@69 I personally don't want 50 to answer that.. *cringes*
dramaelf 37
Make sure your parents buy a more durable door next time.
ironichalibut 24
Yeah, are all the doors in your house prop doors? Sounds like it was pretty easy to bust.
HammyBear13 8
Unless OP is just really fat.
NotGabe 28
Really, what did you expect to happen? You don't exactly bounce off a door if you're ramming it.
wellthen7154 12
Maybe OP did expect that. I do have to wonder though, if OP meant it jokingly, then why would you actually do it? Additionally, who talks to their siblings in the bathroom?! I dunno OP, maybe there's more things wrong with this scenario than just the weak door.
vencku 13
It's like feeling the locked handle or rapping the wood. You do that to show your impatience to the person inside, not to break the door. OP probably expected the door to be hardier. And it's perfectly normal to talk to people in the bathroom: "how much longer do you need?" and "Can you hurry up?".
yeezuschrist420 11
That’s a shit door then.
olpally 33
Way to go genius. I hope they make you pay for a new door too.
MrSarary 26
If she is being grounded by her parents, do you really think she'd be old enough to afford the door?
olpally 33
Op is a guy. Seems Like he's way older if he's able to break a door down like that.
HopelesslyCiara5 19
Bipolar disorder is a serious condition.
HopelesslyCiara5 19
He said he was jokingly threatening it. Then actually rammed into the door, breaking it. That escalated pretty quick. But in any other case I was joking because I don't personally know the OP.
arandomusernameaa 20
Yeh that isn't bipolar disease... It's called being an idiot...
Edumcg 24
You need to practice on the "jokingly" part.
Kiki242 19
Why would you do that? Throwing your entire body weight into a door is not a good idea in no shape or form.
Sinsation 7
Unless you are a trying to break down the door of a burning building to save trapped puppies.
whyisitme12 19
Could you please "jokingly" say you'll send me a million dollars, thanks!!!