Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees". For some reason, everybody pronounces it "your anus". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML
Today, I posted a Happy New Year status for all my Latino friends and family. Well, I missed that año is different from ano, and I used the wrong letter and thus wished everyone a "Happy New Anus." FML
Today, as always, my name is Karen. FML
Today, my girlfriend named our daughter Aspen. Ass. Pen. When I hear her name I will always think of a pen in a butthole. No doubt her future classmates will too. FML
Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-worker's anus. FML
Today, after 26 years of confusion with my parents pronouncing it different ways, and in my mom's case, multiple ways, having to clear up how it's spelled every time I meet someone, I asked my mom how to pronounce my name. She got mad and then pronounced it three different ways while explaining. FML
Today, I realized that I am the only one among my group of friends who names their bowel movements. FML
Today, I realized that since I was in elementary school, my friends, my workmates, and even my family, all call me accidentally by someone else's name instead of my actual name. I'm 30 years-old. FML
Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML
Today, I tore my ass crack. No, not my asshole, my ass crack. I don't know why, I don't know how, I just know it hurts. FML
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Top comments
FellowYellow 10
Ouch OP! Guess your parents wouldn't think it would bother you whenever you hear someone go "Hey how's Yarenis?" Change your name if you want to!
DocBastard 40
I know what you're going through. My name is "Yeraneediot".
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Comments (126)
angelitared 27
Man, this is a bummer! Change your name quick.
citlali06 14
I know exactly how you feel about people mispronouncing your name! Happens to me all the time!
JMichael 26
Unfortunately I can see why they'd think that OP. Just do your best to teach them the correct pronunciation.
KaylaTackett 18
Change your name then?
stargirl_95 24
I know what you're going through. I'm going to assume that your first language is not English and I will say that English speakers usually butcher foreign names. My name is Naledi (nah-leh-dee) and it sometimes gets butchered to na-lady or ne-lady. Not as bad as what you're going through but still annoying. The best you can do is go by an easy to pronounce nickname.
Epikouros 32
Just change your name to Yapenis. Problem solved!
emmaps 3
I'm sorry yeranus
worldclassrager 41
Go by your middle name or something...but I have to say that's a cool name..
buckdharma 38
Unless his middle name is Hemorrhoid.
pageantgirl22 11
I pronounced it yah-ren-ees
wvcheesehead 13
I know of a planet with a similar complaint.