Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees". For some reason, everybody pronounces it "your anus". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML
Today, I posted a Happy New Year status for all my Latino friends and family. Well, I missed that año is different from ano, and I used the wrong letter and thus wished everyone a "Happy New Anus." FML
Today, as always, my name is Karen. FML
Today, my girlfriend named our daughter Aspen. Ass. Pen. When I hear her name I will always think of a pen in a butthole. No doubt her future classmates will too. FML
Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-worker's anus. FML
Today, after 26 years of confusion with my parents pronouncing it different ways, and in my mom's case, multiple ways, having to clear up how it's spelled every time I meet someone, I asked my mom how to pronounce my name. She got mad and then pronounced it three different ways while explaining. FML
Today, I realized that I am the only one among my group of friends who names their bowel movements. FML
Today, I realized that since I was in elementary school, my friends, my workmates, and even my family, all call me accidentally by someone else's name instead of my actual name. I'm 30 years-old. FML
Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML
Today, I tore my ass crack. No, not my asshole, my ass crack. I don't know why, I don't know how, I just know it hurts. FML
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Top comments
FellowYellow 10
Ouch OP! Guess your parents wouldn't think it would bother you whenever you hear someone go "Hey how's Yarenis?" Change your name if you want to!
DocBastard 40
I know what you're going through. My name is "Yeraneediot".
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Comments (126)
FelicityWishes 32
Can't blame them!!
kissandcontrol01 20
Did I go to school with you?!
victorcaulfield 3
Get use to it or change your name. No one likes a whiner.
polluxdc 10
I know what you mean. I have a definitely male name (according to its meaning) that has only just recently become a popular name for females. Been called Ms. to my face. Don't personally know many women with a braid-able goatee and a shaved head, but I guess there's always a first time for everything.
miss_esoteric 8
It's okay... my name is worse. Fanny.
uncledik 1
Brush it off. I grew up with the name Dick
CzechIsBack 15
The reason everybody pronounced it that way, is the fact that that's how it's pronounced! Either change your name, or deal with it
rockhead1270 5
Why didn't they just name you dickweed
Tshep4209 6
you would to
meljns 7
I would just change it if I were you.