Today, my boss sent me a text message saying, "You're fired. Merry Christmas!" FML
But…
Today, I went to my retail job to buy some clothing. As soon as I walked through the doors, my manager yelled at me for not being in appropriate work clothes. I tried to explain that I was off the clock but he was having none of it. I got written up. FML
Disappointed
Today, at work, a customer cried because the cake I made her was not "exactly" the same as the display. I'm the one who made the display and it was the same but the display cake had faded a bit, since it had been there for a month. I'd mentioned this to the customer when she placed the order. FML
Today, I found out I was the top ranking sales person for 2014. What did last year's winner receive? An all-expenses paid weekend holiday. What did I receive? A ham. I'm vegetarian. FML
Today, immediately after being informed of the sketchy activities that take place in our store parking lot after dark, I'm handed an orange vest and told to go out there to retrieve carts. FML
Today, since it's company policy, I had to go to the back of my small store to retrieve an item for a customer, even though I was working by myself. I came back to find that since she couldn't get into the cash register, she found and stole my purse instead. FML
Good omens, etc.
Today, my boss sent me a link on how to write a good resignation letter. FML
New management
Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss's new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off." She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML
Today, I was fired for "smelling like garbage". I'm the guy who throws the garbage into the truck. FML
Ajwc95 tells us more.
Ajwc95 23
OP here. I did so apparently. I'm going see if I can fight this though.
Today, the lady whose son I babysit sent me a text, saying she left a gift for me for all the hard work I've done. I found a beautifully-wrapped box where she said the gift was. It turned out my actual gift was cookies sitting right next to it. FML
1dvos_grl3 tells us more.
1dvos_grl3 21
Hey everyone, OP here. Let me shed a little light here. I was greatful she got me something to begin with! So don't say I wasn't, the sugar cookies were very yummy. It was just very misleading is all. And everyone curious what was in the wrapped present I didn't open it, there was a note flap on it and it didn't have my name on it. I texted her confused and she said it was the cookies. So yes I was greatful, and I'm a bit curious what she got 'Sara' too.
Today, I got 3 different rejection letters mailed to me from the same college. FML
Be gone, brand
Today, after finally finishing a huge internal rebranding project at work, which I've poured blood, sweat and tears into over the last 12 months, I found out we're being acquired by another company and that our new brand will no longer exist. FML
Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML
thankssomuch tells us more.
thankssomuch 11
Hey this is the Op.. So many great comments haha. I completely regret confirming it, it was like I walked into a trap. I'm going to talk to my head boss though because it's kind of ridiculous
Grow up
Today, a student's mother sent me an e-mail complaining that I was requiring her child to read a book containing mild profanity. She then demanded me to let him read an easier book. This would've been somewhat acceptable if the student wasn't in the 12th grade. FML
Today, my parents decided to finally kick me out of the house because they've gotten tired of seeing me "sleep around all day and being so lazy" whenever I'm home. I'm currently triple-shifting for 6 days a week. FML
Today, after months of correcting him, I got so used to my boss calling me "Alex" that I didn't respond to my own name several times today. FML
1Nsan3 tells us more.
1Nsan3 11
Op here forgot to mention name tags break company dress code sadly
Today, my boss threw a pre-Christmas party at work. He always uses them to rant at us and tell us to be better employees. When the speech began, the alarm I have set for my daily birth control went off. It's the sound of an obnoxious screaming child. FML
Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML
Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML
Today, I thought it'd be fun to kick open one of those unisex bathrooms in my workplace. I'm not sure who was more surprised, me or my boss who was in there taking a dump. FML
Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML
Today, my boss commented on the fact that I don't usually wear makeup, then told me it would be much appreciated if I'd change that. FML
Know your place
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his goddamn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML
Today, my daughter decided it'd be funny to change the time on my clock. My boss didn't think it was funny. FML
Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML
Today, at the fast food joint I work at, I had to climb into the children's play area and chase out two horny teens who thought it was an appropriate place to stick their hands down each other's pants and fool around. I don't get paid enough for this shit. FML
quickit tells us more.
quickit 24
Hey you guys it's OP. Reading some of the comments have made me laugh a lot! But allow me to shed some light on the situation. So I was just entering into my third week of working at Mc Donald's when this happened. An old woman noticed the two teens go into the play structure and reported it to us. We have a strict policy that children over the age of twelve aren't allowed into the play place. Part of that reason is due to size. Anyways after trying to convince the kids to come out my manager told me to go up there and get them out. I could barely fit into the structure but they came out shortly after. It ended with both of them being banned from that restaurant and their parents being called to pick them up. I'm only working there part time because I am a student but I hope I don't have to do anything too crazy like this again.
Today, while working in a restaurant, a woman told me I was completely incompetent, was the worst hostess she'd ever seen, and that she would call my district manager non-stop until I was fired. I'd clocked in less than 10 minutes before and hadn't said a single word to her. FML
christinamarie17 tells us more.
Hey guys! Just thought I'd explain since I couldn't fit the whole story into the FML. The woman had come into the restaurant about three months ago with two other ladies. I hadn't been up front at first and she was initially talking to another hostess. The first host tried to sit her at a table, at which point the woman said she wanted a booth. I joined the conversation at this point and stated we had a booth in Ryan's section. The woman exclaimed "Oh! Ryan!" She seemed excited so I said, "Yes, do you like Ryan? I can give you one of his tables." The woman said "Oh no, I have no idea who Ryan is. I've never been here before." I said "Oh, okay then. I'll sit you with Robert. Wait no, Robert just got a table. Let's go to Rachel." I took her to the table, asked if it was alright and she said it was fine. Thinking everything was okay I left. Halfway through her meal I see my manager at the table apologizing profusely. Once he left he asked me what the hell I did to the woman. Apparently she told her server that I tried to seat her at a table, refused to let her sit with Ryan and Robert, and forced her to sit here. She called me a twit, told her server she felt bad because Ryan and Robert were missing out on the huge tip she was going to give them, and that I don't know how to do my job. Since that day she has written to corporate saying that I am condescending, speak to my co-workers inappropriately, and need to be retrained. Yesterday was the first time she actually got in my face about it, and I was so stunned all I could say was "I'm sorry." I'm not trying to make myself out to be the model employee but this lady seems to have a personal vendetta against me. My managers have been understanding about it and I'm just hoping that with time she'll stop harassing me!
Today, I got a letter in the mail from corporate saying that I'm being demoted because I don't work enough hours. I also got a text from my boss congratulating me on making the best sales numbers for November. FML
nikkih_06 tells us more.
nikkih_06 16
I was demoted from part time to causal part time, which requires that I work less then 20 hours a week. And I only get commission if I go over my goal.
Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML
Today, I had a performance. I have to go bra-less to wear my gown and I didn't want any peek-a-boos. I asked my boyfriend to bring "large band-aids" without telling him why I needed them. He brought waterproof, top-notch tough ones. They're still stuck to me, and are not coming off anytime soon. FML