Nearly FMLs

By Anonymous - 08/01/2017 03:14

Today, I had to follow a diversion route home due to road works. It took me an hour longer than usual to get home. Too bad it turns out that the diversion was only for traffic, not people walking.....FML.

I agree, your life sucks 139

You deserved it 131

By hegggie - 08/01/2017 01:26

Today, me and my boyfriend were in the middle of sex. Just after I orgasmed, we realised that we had knocked my phone and accidentally rung my mother. We'd been on the phone for 26 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 81

By ManChild - 07/01/2017 23:23

Today, I was playing Luigi's Mansion on the Gamecube, when a ghost came out and scared the shit out of me, and I don't mean that figuratively. I literally crapped my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 77

By Catdragon - 07/01/2017 22:10

Today, I went to an interview. It was ok, but as expected I got a rejection email. Shortly after I received that email, I got a call saying somehow there was a mix up and my application got sent to the wrong one. Now they are saying I should call them back & schedule at least a phone interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 268

You deserved it 28

By Reasona - 07/01/2017 22:08

Today, I got fired from my job. I quit my other job to take this one.. Now I am unemployed. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 52

By accduo - 07/01/2017 22:04

Today, is the day after I learned that my FML account had been banned for no apparent reason. I had to make a new account in order to post this, and I lost all my progress on reading all the FMLs on the site. I was 50% done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 43

By Anonymous - 07/01/2017 21:57

Today, my partner is breaking up with me because I apparently text someone about work more than I text her.

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 54

By 8bit_outlaw - 07/01/2017 21:43

Today, I was driving back home with baby in tow. Stopped at a red light perfectly fine too. Light turned green and my tire blew up. Guess who's waiting at taco bell with a screaming baby?

I agree, your life sucks 300

You deserved it 20

By meh - 07/01/2017 18:51

Today, it snowed in the south, so i shoveled the steps and walkway. We got rid of our snow shovels when we moved so i used a metal one. Because there was a layer of ice i had to use some force to break it. My mom informed me that the sun would melted it and that i may of damaged the cement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 62

By Highfunctioningsociopath - 07/01/2017 16:52

Today I was getting excited to watch Sherlock after years of waiting but halfway in, my family snatches the remote because they want to see a stupid reality show which airs every day. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 325

You deserved it 33

By Anonymous - 07/01/2017 16:29

Today, all of the ratings I have put on the FMLs have been reset - how am I supposed to get the Gold Ninja Level "read all FMLs" now? FML

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 36

By Flights flights flights - 07/01/2017 15:34

Today after making first flight after getting a call about them being cancled and rescheduled yesterday, I'm told my connecting flight is canncled and my next flight won't leave for 30 hours FML

I agree, your life sucks 246

You deserved it 26

By sadness - 07/01/2017 15:33

Today, I went to do my daily routine of reading the latest FMLs and the Follow-ups only to find the follow-up section blank on the app and missing on the website. It's been this way for days now. I suspect the follow-up has been taken down. Goodbye daily routine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 208

You deserved it 28

By runnr - 07/01/2017 15:12

Today, after my first ever track meet, I angrily asked my mom why she didn't save me any pizza last night. As it turns out, she did, but my asshole of a brother ate it before I could get home. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 296

You deserved it 63

By Anonymous - 07/01/2017 14:28

Today, after 5 months of waiting, her underwear FINALLY was off and I was gonna get some, and then the baby cried...for 2hrs. Welcome to parenthood.

I agree, your life sucks 272

You deserved it 63

By Anonymous - 07/01/2017 11:03

Today, my mom who threw me out days before Christmas gave me a huge hug and brought me food, would have been nice if she didn't kick me out over something I didn't do and she told me was allowed anyways, that's my family support system for you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 228

You deserved it 11

By piztdude - 07/01/2017 10:02

Today, I went to use the FML app on my phone, and instead of an albeit annoying pop up advert that I could quickly dispose of, I was forced to sit through a video of a game I have no interest in. Look like I'll have to FML on the browser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 221

You deserved it 36

By brooksbecrazy - 07/01/2017 09:06

Today, I realized that no matter how hard I try to make things work with the person who also 'likes me back', I'm always going to be the second choice. Actually, it's worse than that. I'm never going to be a choice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 27

By Anonymous - 07/01/2017 08:53

Today, i wanted to tell a good friend how i felt about her, and she introduced me to the guy she wants to go out with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 23

By Anonymous - 07/01/2017 06:52

Today, while recovering from a 12 hour stomach flu, I was feeling much better. Getting up for lunch, I felt some gas. Long story short I shit my pants for the first time as an adult. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 36

By MindGames - 07/01/2017 06:46

Today, it's my birthday, I went out to a nice meal with my family. I was supposed to ride with my brother but after stopping to get gas and use the bathroom I found myself abandoned. Happy birthday to me, FML.

I agree, your life sucks 277

You deserved it 15

By forever_alone - 07/01/2017 06:31

Today, I finally talked to the guy in my office that has been giving me those "cum fuck me eyes" for months !! He walked up to me introduce himself and started to flirt with me vary sweetly.. That's when I noticed he stuffed his hand with his wedding ring in his pocket. Wow just wow

I agree, your life sucks 254

You deserved it 40

By crappyphotog - 07/01/2017 05:53

Today, I ate something that REALLY didn't agree with me and it's not looking hopefully that I will recover quickly. Tomorrow I have to photograph a wedding out in the countryside.

I agree, your life sucks 246

You deserved it 20

By Ellie - 07/01/2017 03:59

Today, I came onto the site to see that FML had made a weak attempt of becoming more like facebook. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 245

You deserved it 43

By anon - 07/01/2017 03:30

Today, my top college choice denied me acceptance. Hours later my godfather passed away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 20

By Anonymous - 07/01/2017 03:05

Today, is my birthday today is also the day I found out my dog is dying and I woke up with the flu this morning. Happy birthday to me! FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 15

By moi - 07/01/2017 02:52

Today, a classmate left the room without telling my teacher. He then says "why doesn't anyone tell me when they're leaving?" I then got up and he started yelling at me and asking me where I was going. I got screamed at in front of the whole class for getting up to recycle a water bottle.

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 51

By Lady Zee - 07/01/2017 02:51

Today, I brought my two cats in to protect them from the freeze tonight. now my room reeks of cat urine. fml

I agree, your life sucks 233

You deserved it 85

By Moves like Jagger - 07/01/2017 02:08

Today, I got on my usual bart ride home. A man was playing his boom box loudly and I got a shiver. Everyone saw me and assumed I had "mad dance skills" and began chanting "go go go!" I have zero dancing ability and now I'm expected to put on a number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 27

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The Top

Today, I accidentally posted an extensive, negative review of the gynecologist I visited earlier this week. I messed up and posted it from my work's customer service email, so now it looks like the large, well-known company I work for had a poor gynecological experience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 885

You deserved it 23 140

Today, I tripped over a kid at work. She was sitting on the floor with her legs sticking out into the walkway. Her mom caused a scene, accusing me of doing it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 865

You deserved it 107

Today, I fell and sprained my ankle while trying to step into my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 928

You deserved it 6 689

Today, I went to the bathroom to take a piss. While washing my hands, I heard someone taking a large dump in one of the stalls. When he was finished, he left the bathroom without washing his hands. Turns out he was the IT guy I called to fix my computer. He sat down on my chair and used my keyboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 417

You deserved it 2 505

Today, my friends and I spent a little too long enjoying a beautiful cliff overlooking the ocean. We spent the next 3 hours lost in a pitch black jungle with only one pocket-sized flashlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 757

You deserved it 13 006

Today, at work, I shat myself at my desk thinking it was a fart. I had to waddle down to the parking garage and drive myself home. I’m a grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 413