Nearly FMLs

By explodingpies - 06/01/2017 03:54

Today, My son decided that he wants to breastfeed. I battled with him to breastfeed when he was a newborn. Now he's 4 months old and my supply is drying up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 13

By Anonymous - 06/01/2017 03:04

Today, I was going to sell on eBay a pair of beautiful sneakers I received for Christmas in the wrong size, so I can use the money to buy the last available pair in the right size. My dad went on a tirade that only popular black kids want the latest shoes and I shouldn't as a white 29 year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 12

By tacts - 06/01/2017 02:57

Today I came to know that wherever we have sex, my wife always fantasises of her first time with her first lover. We are married since more than a decade.

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 17

By Anonymous - 06/01/2017 02:28

Today, a woman backed into my parked car and refused to pay for damages, this wouldnt have been as bad had my dad not smashed my car into a pole in a parking garage last week

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 13

By Anonymous - 06/01/2017 02:25

I am in a long distance relationship and only see my boyfriend about once a month. I text him a lot and he doesn't reply because he's playing video games. Today, he came to my house and brought his Xbox with him to play while i talked to my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 33

By poopypants - 06/01/2017 02:02

Today I didn't quite make it on to the toilet before my explosive diarrhea came out all over the toilet seat and the wall behind it. No matter how much toilet paper I used there was no use. When I came out there was a line that had formed to use said bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 22

By Amazn1234 - 06/01/2017 01:09

today I was assigned a group project. Not too big of a deal right? Except that out of the 6 people in the group only me and one other person worked on it. AND the group who has the best 3 projects gets extra credit, gets to drop their lowest quiz and they get to skip the class final

I agree, your life sucks 139

You deserved it 6

By AnnaBanana - 06/01/2017 00:53

Today I decided to listen to my parents and clean the house. Lucky me when they got home they both got pissed at me. My mom got pissed because I put the peas somewhere and my father because he can't find piece of paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 235

You deserved it 18

By Anonymous - 06/01/2017 00:46

After knowing I failed most my classes and screwing up a 2 and a half year relationship last month, I thought 2017 could only get better after that. My grandmother just passed away.. Great Start. FML

I agree, your life sucks 178

You deserved it 22

By Anonymous - 06/01/2017 00:19

Today, I cleaned my entire house just for my one year old son and our dogs to come through and pull everything back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 28

By Anonymous - 05/01/2017 20:48

Today, I woke up with carpet burn. From sleeping. Alone. In my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 21

By Anonymous - 05/01/2017 20:12

Today, I came into work and my boss tells me that I have to move an entire room full of parts out into the truck and that my coworker is going to help me. Both my coworker and boss dipped out even though we're all of equal rank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 222

You deserved it 8

By kat - 05/01/2017 17:57

Today, I came to the realization I'm too anxious to have roommates. I have stress constipation and stomach aches from being nervous around them. I really have to go to the bathroom but my roommate has been in the kitchen and I'm too scared to go.

I agree, your life sucks 169

You deserved it 32

By Josh - 05/01/2017 02:21 - United States

Today, I accidentally stuck a drill bit through my thumb nail on accident. I was using a drill while driving a screw with my right and holding the board down with my left. The bit unseated and slipped, driving a solid hole through my nail. My entire arm went weak for a good hour. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 23

By GoodWifi - 05/01/2017 02:10

Today, a girl in one of my advanced classes asked, "Is water alive?" She wasn't joking, and now I'm the dumb one because I sarcastically responded with, "Yeah, because it's got three different states." FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 34

By carguys27 - 04/01/2017 22:29 - United States

Today, after years of work 42k dollars later, we got a phone call saying that the car me and my dad built that was my moms who passed away, was stolen from the shop we were having it tuned at. And their cameras are for looks only. Good bye 68' charger R/T with actual 426 hemi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 66

By Fsvb - 04/01/2017 22:08

Today, I've had bad coughing fits for a couple of days. My boyfriend and I were visiting my mom, who worriedly said I should see the doctor, because my coughing will probably keep my poor boyfriend awake at night. They keep me up at night too, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 487

You deserved it 31

By Surprise - 04/01/2017 21:49

Today, my husband returned early from a long business trip. He said he wanted to take me out to eat and had a big surprise for me. All excited, I dressed for the evening and out the door we went. The surprise? A new Dodge Ram truck sitting in our driveway, that he'd bought... for himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 897

You deserved it 509

By professionalcriar - 04/01/2017 20:48

Today, while riding the bus home, I was crying because my boyfriend broke up with me earlier. A little boy turned around and asked me: 'Are you crying because you're not pretty?'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 40

By Anonymous - 04/01/2017 18:49

Today, needing to study for exams, I submitted a complaint about the student next door blasting 24/7 rap music. Not only was he allowed to continue, but I was written up for "disrespecting his culture". FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 749

You deserved it 831

By Friendless - 04/01/2017 17:45

Today, I learned that my closest friend of nearly three years never actually cared about me. She just kept me around as back up if things fell through with her boyfriend. She stopped talking to me when I revealed that I wasn't interested in a relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 29

By Anonymous - 04/01/2017 17:42

Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me if I cannot make other men find me less attractive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 429

You deserved it 35

By Qthekucky - 04/01/2017 17:32

Today. I just finished installing these new duel video cards in my PC. Took forever, tons of troubleshooting and installing. Then as soon as I'm finally done. I find out that my old card I was using is better then the new ones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 137

You deserved it 67

By jealous MIL - 04/01/2017 17:31 - United States - Kingman

Today, my boyfriend's mother sobbed to me about the fact that my boyfriend uses the Christmas gift I gave him more than the one she gave him. I got him a scarf, she got him a laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 26

By daidax_238 - 04/01/2017 16:19 - United States - Dayton

Today, it's my birthday. I have been sick since mid December, and the antibiotics the doctor gave me make me puke. In other words, I can either cough and sneeze my lungs out, or take the antibiotic and puke my guts out. Happy birthday to me! FML.

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 23

By Alexander_Liao - 04/01/2017 16:13

Today, I was supposed to go work on a high school project with one of my friends. Apparently, she thought I said "January 4 or 10 or 12", but I said "January 4 from 10 to 12". Now I'm sitting in the library working on it by myself while she's in another province. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 7

By bbplz - 04/01/2017 06:14 - United States - Dallas

Today, I just got over the flu that I had all week. I also just started my period, today. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 63

You deserved it 5

By bbplz - 04/01/2017 06:14 - United States - Dallas

Today, I just got over the flu that I had all week. I also just started my period, today. Fml

I agree, your life sucks 38

You deserved it 6

By Ally - 04/01/2017 09:12

For my uncles wedding he asked us to submit songs. I didn't have a preference so I had my gf do it for me. Later she broke up with me and never came to the wedding. I still went and half way through the reception I had a song dedicated to me and my ex gf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 306

You deserved it 25

By anonymous - 04/01/2017 07:14 - United States - Westlake

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he saw me with an older man at a restaurant. That man was my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 368

You deserved it 23

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I'm seven months into a twelve month deployment. I called my fiancée, and she dumped me. The worst part is that two days ago, I re-enlisted to go to a unit an hour away from her house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 258

You deserved it 2 510

Today, my 19-year-old, long-distance boyfriend told me he wouldn't be able to text me all day because it's too hard to type while in his Spider-Man suit. It's non-negotiable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 289

You deserved it 15 335

Today, I gathered the courage and wrote a love letter to put in the girl I like's school bag, at the end of classes. I felt anxious for a response. Her bag turned out to be her cousin's, and I became a joke in the classroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 583

You deserved it 334

Today, my girlfriend and I were role playing when her mum walked past the slightly open door, saw me, and chased me out of the house for stealing her baby's innocence. I was only wearing a red speedo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 793

You deserved it 38 989

Today, the guardian angel charm my grandma gave to me for "safe driving" fell off my sun visor while I was driving. This scared me enough to cause me to swerve into another moving car. So much for safe driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 715

You deserved it 7 124

Today, my dad tried to convert me, as he has numerous times before, and asked me why I was an atheist. After giving him a polite explanation and asking him if we could drop the subject, he nodded slowly and said, "You must be menstruating or something. You'll change your mind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 917

You deserved it 289