Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Man or woman?

Today, after submitting my college application, I noticed that I mistyped "math enthusiast" as "meth enthusiast". FML

#21481486
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24660) - you deserved it (7495)

On 10/18/2015 at 3:18pm - work - by RIPcareer - United States (Maryland)

Today, I tried to make a move on the cute guy who sits opposite me at work. In theory, I was going to start a game of footsie with him. In practice, I screwed up and managed to yank his computer's power cable out. He lost his unsaved work. FML

#21480774
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19906) - you deserved it (16018)

On 10/16/2015 at 2:04pm - work - by Namaslayed (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

#21480714
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22587) - you deserved it (1665)

On 10/16/2015 at 9:31am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got turned down by my dream job because their rival company happens to be called my exact name. I'm now known as "The Spy". FML

#21480450
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22606) - you deserved it (1412)

On 10/15/2015 at 4:44pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Richmond upon Thames)

Today, I drove to my college campus for my 8 a.m. class, parked, walked the mile and a half to my classroom, just to find out class had been cancelled. The prof didn't send an email because she couldn't remember her password. I paid $1200 to be taught by this woman, who has a doctorate. FML

#21480276
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24268) - you deserved it (2092)

On 10/15/2015 at 1:07am - work - by crb25453 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got yelled at in a grocery store by a customer who recognized me from the pizza place where I work. Apparently, I forgot mushrooms on her pizza earlier this afternoon. I had the day off, but thanks for the verbal lashing, lady. FML

#21479832
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (1763)

On 10/14/2015 at 1:40am - work - by mushroomless - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I nearly got written up at work for missing an important memo. The memo was sent to everyone via the company Facebook group and not by our e-mail system. My manager could hardly believe people exist who have no Facebook account and have no intention of making one. FML

#21479032
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25485) - you deserved it (2293)

On 10/12/2015 at 11:43am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a woman at work told me that her kid had puked into "a storage bin" in the office. It wasn't a storage bin, it was the outgoing mail tray on the side of my desk containing important contract documents that had to be posted by 5pm that day. FML

#21478930
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26784) - you deserved it (1575)

On 10/12/2015 at 5:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I'm no longer allowed to work the drive-thru at my job, because over the weekend, 3 dumbasses I go to school with came in and complained to my manager, saying I sounded a creepy pervert and that it scared them enough to take their business elsewhere. FML

#21478786
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25001) - you deserved it (1840)

On 10/11/2015 at 10:07pm - work - by why (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went in for an interview for my first ever job. Just seconds after meeting the boss, I slipped on the linoleum floor. I was wearing a skirt. FML

#21477906
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23645) - you deserved it (2137)

On 10/09/2015 at 12:58pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, while walking home after a night of partying, I saw a thin, bald person in a suit looking at me from across the street. I got flashbacks to the Slender Man, screamed like a little bitch and ran. Then I realized I'd just humiliated myself in front of some random guy waiting for a bus. FML

#21477518
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14904) - you deserved it (17533)

On 10/08/2015 at 12:04pm - work - by shitbucketsfilledwithshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, in the middle of a presentation, I fought a shart, but the shart won. FML

#21477505
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24882) - you deserved it (2652)

On 10/08/2015 at 11:10am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, an elderly gentleman customer decided to tell me that while I'm not attractive at all, he'd still bang me all the same. Then he gave me a pained smile, like he was struggling not to shit himself, and left. I'm starting to hate working retail. FML

#21477497
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22073) - you deserved it (1492)

On 10/08/2015 at 10:46am - work - by CA (woman) - Norway



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