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Sunday 18 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML

#20170012
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20352) - you deserved it (1903)

On 11/19/2012 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML

#20173351
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19967) - you deserved it (3587)

On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while sitting in a waiting room, a man assured me "The safety's on" after he handed his kid his BB gun. A minute later, I practically had a hole in my foot. FML

#20160435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19686) - you deserved it (2436)

On 11/12/2012 at 1:12pm - health - by Emily - United States (California)

Today, my family came over for Thanksgiving. We were supposed to have had dinner hours ago, but my mom kept sneaking into the kitchen and dialing down the temperature on the oven, claiming I was going to overcook everything. At this rate, we'll be lucky to have eaten by midnight. FML

#20174185
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19660) - you deserved it (1434)

On 11/22/2012 at 6:18pm - misc - by mommycooks (woman) - United States

Today, I ran into my boss outside of work. She smiled, and started trying to have an in-depth chat with me. I wouldn't have minded, if it weren't for the fact I ran into her at a club, whilst they were having an S and M theme night. And we were both fully dressed up for it. FML

#20172556
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19646) - you deserved it (3957)

On 11/21/2012 at 3:43pm - work - by jobsearching (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML

#20161557
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19618) - you deserved it (1950)

On 11/13/2012 at 5:00am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML

#20170511
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19473) - you deserved it (2868)

On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

#20178213
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19396) - you deserved it (1340)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I had a booth at a very expensive craft show. My grandma came to show her support. While there, she managed to knock over my display, get in the way of potential buyers and take down a rather old lady when she supposedly stumbled. This all happened in the first five minutes she was there. FML

#20167730
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19303) - you deserved it (1584)

On 11/18/2012 at 5:02am - work - by soldnone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML

#20179069
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19062) - you deserved it (2973)

On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, after finishing a test, I decided to draw to pass the time. My teacher looked at the drawing and gave me a referral to the principal for drawing an "anti-Semitic picture." I'd drawn Superman. FML

#20163905
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18944) - you deserved it (1505)

On 11/15/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Superman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out the can of spray paint I got at Walmart yesterday has no spray nozzle, rendering it useless. I'm working on a project that needs to be done by the weekend, so I get to go wait in a huge line and risk being trampled to death tonight just to exchange one damn spray paint can. FML

#20174445
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18912) - you deserved it (2661)

On 11/22/2012 at 9:56pm - misc - by Unfortunate Painter - United States (California)

Today, after spending 3 hours raking leaves, I went to the store to get some supplies. I came back to find my neighbor had decided to blow his leaves all over my yard. FML

#20163199
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18809) - you deserved it (1478)

On 11/14/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by racking-leaves - United States



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