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Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

#18671217
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51820) - you deserved it (3617)

On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my friend put my phone number on Craigslist. I still can't find the ad, but obviously everyone else can because I still haven't stopped receiving naked pictures. FML

#20419133
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35845) - you deserved it (3617)

On 12/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Chanman1924 - United States

Today, after finals, my English professor left me less than one percent from an A. Why? All semester long, he took away points because my opinions did not match his. FML

Today, my garage was flooded. Everything was ruined. My garage also happens to be my study, in which my entire art coursework was drying. My exam is tomorrow and all I have to hand in is a pile of mushy paper. FML

#16042714
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34227) - you deserved it (3616)

On 05/04/2011 at 9:47am - work - by lottielondon (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

#20490582
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52147) - you deserved it (3616)

On 02/02/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium

Today, my in-laws came for dinner. My 5-year-old son chose that as the perfect time to say, "Good girls always swallow!" when my daughter coughed up some of her food. I have no idea where he heard it, but my mother-in-law blamed me, and my wife had to convince her not to call CPS on me. FML

#20689805
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48257) - you deserved it (3616)

On 05/27/2013 at 6:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my proposal to my girlfriend was supposed to be exactly when the ball dropped at midnight. Unfortunately my mother called her at 11:55pm to ask her if she liked the ring. FML

#21328278
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43687) - you deserved it (3616)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:47am - love - by Proposal Fail - United States (New York)

Today, I was watching TV with my grandma. I said aloud, "Dang, that actor is hot." My grandma pointed out he was a spitting image of my cousin. I realized she was right, and that I may as well be attracted to my own cousin. FML

#20072880
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21232) - you deserved it (3615)

On 09/15/2012 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, a customer wanted a military discount for buying two 39 cent Slim Jims. I work at an auto parts store. FML

#20854690
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37930) - you deserved it (3615)

On 08/26/2013 at 1:51am - work - by luvmypony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend, only for her to slap me, throwing the "fake ring" away and storming off, convinced it was a cruel joke. FML

#21265921
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41156) - you deserved it (3615)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

#21287735
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34562) - you deserved it (3615)

On 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm - kids - by lexigan4 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my college professor handed every student a note card and told us to rate his looks from 1 to 5. Is this what I pay $20,000 a year for? FML

#14716762
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31575) - you deserved it (3614)

On 01/26/2011 at 2:45am - misc - by SLOMan90 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML

#15207309
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44768) - you deserved it (3614)

On 03/05/2011 at 3:26pm - misc - by devinbyrne - United States (Texas)



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