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Today, after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate, I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates. However, the post sparked an argument with my mom's childhood best friend, that ended with her telling me that my dad isn't actually my dad. FML

#20120633
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28058) - you deserved it (3285)

On 10/17/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by bastardchild_01 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had to go to the hospital for an allergic reaction. Turns out, I'm highly allergic to cherry blossoms. My wife and I just bought a house and moved into a new neighborhood. Almost every block in this neighborhood, including my own, has rows and rows of cherry blossom trees. FML

#20628272
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44243) - you deserved it (3285)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:10pm - health - by verycherryfucked (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, I dug out the 5 fancy, extremely expensive candles I bought during Black Friday. I lit one up, and was delighted that it smelled so great. My mother then walked into my room and stated that it smelled "like shit". The other four were going to be a Christmas gift for her. FML

#21309261
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30843) - you deserved it (3285)

On 12/01/2014 at 2:30am - money - by shitty candles - United States (Washington)

Today, the girl I had a crush on for the past few months called me and wanted to tell me something. Excited, I agreed and we went out to dinner. She wanted to tell me she had been secretly seeing 'someone' for the past six months. FML

#6733753
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23978) - you deserved it (3284)

On 12/13/2009 at 2:36am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (California)

Today, I ran into my ex's family, and found out they are going to Europe. Funnily enough, so am I. Even funnier is the fact that we are going on the same date, at the same time, on the same flights, and the tour starts on the same day in the same place. FML

#7810675
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35052) - you deserved it (3284)

On 02/02/2010 at 9:08am - misc - by jacques (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was meeting my husband's old friends at his 20 year high school reunion. He introduced me as his 'friend from work' to his ex girlfriend. FML

#12224799
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38718) - you deserved it (3284)

On 07/31/2010 at 11:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a date with a guy, who decided to rudely text message his friend the whole time. When I got home, I realized he'd been texting the girl he was going to hookup with after our date; she happens to be my roommate. FML

#14826546
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36321) - you deserved it (3284)

On 02/03/2011 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I found out that my now-ex slept with his not-so-ex the day before our wedding. FML

#15702411
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43840) - you deserved it (3284)

On 04/09/2011 at 12:02am - love - by WhatTheBleep (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML

#18508427
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53955) - you deserved it (3284)

On 12/14/2011 at 12:15am - love - by newlysingle (man) - United States

Today, my book bag was so heavy that it set off my car's passenger detection system in the front seat. I had to buckle in my textbooks. FML

#20068805
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23270) - you deserved it (3284)

On 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my husband put some photos of our wedding on Facebook. He named the album "FML". FML

#19832174
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31573) - you deserved it (3284)

On 06/23/2012 at 1:17am - misc - by blah56 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, me and some friends had home-made burgers for lunch. The guy who did the cooking later insisted that spitting in a frying pan is a perfectly acceptable way of guessing the right time to add the oil. FML

#21009569
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37638) - you deserved it (3284)

On 12/29/2013 at 6:28pm - health - by HungerStrike (man) - Czech Republic (Stredocesky kraj)



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