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A) at least he sent you one; B) your maiden name is likely his last name and that probably means a lot to him; C) at least you have a dad. D) all of that is bullshit reasoning and really that's kind of shitty of him.

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A) at least he sent you one; B) your maiden name is likely his last name and that probably means a lot to him; C) at least you have a dad. D) all of that is bullshit reasoning and really that's kind of shitty of him.

You have some options: 1: Divorce your husband and revert to your maiden name. 2: Legally change your name 3: Jump in your handy dandy time machine and go back ten years. 4: Set fire to the check and cut off all contact with your father. 5: Laugh it off and don't overthink it. I suggest number 3.

I'm sorry about that, OP. Does he have a problem with the marraige or something? If he still uses your maiden name after ten years. then it might be time to talk to him when you have the chance (if you haven't talked to him already)

it may be he doesn't want it to go to you and your husband but wants it just for you. my dad does the same thing. he gives me money and days don't tell (my husband) it's a dad gift haha.

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I don't think it would be about the husband being controlling... more of the dad wanting to be like "here, actually buy yourself something because you deserve it, don't just put it towards bills." Giving it to just the daughter/wife gives it a chance to be an actual gift, not a little extra money for necessities.

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If my mom or dad gave me money, I'd buy or do something nice for myself. I'd still tell my girlfriend about it, though. No reason to be secretive unless you either already have, or are trying to cause, money issues in your relationship.

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#12, my dh is far from controlling. #28, not that it would be used for bills but more I'd spend it on my kids before I'd spend it on me. and my dad wasn't around for 13yrs of my life, from when I was 12-25, so now he says he calls it a dad gift cuz he's here and can give it to me. didn't think my comment would be taken the wrong way actually.

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