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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I opened my front door to be greeted by what I can only describe as the stink of death. After moving furniture and lifting floorboards, frantically searching for whatever had died, I finally discovered the actual source of the stench - my girlfriend's feet. FML

#21426359
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27525) - you deserved it (2348)

On 06/15/2015 at 7:57am - misc - by Gagging (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I was drying myself with a towel after a shower when I noticed a bad smell. After running out of toilet paper last night, one of my friends decided to use my clean towel to wipe herself instead. FML

#21426197
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27808) - you deserved it (2177)

On 06/14/2015 at 10:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out why my mother-in-law kept asking for one particular photo of our baby. She just wanted to show off the blanket that she had made to her friends on Facebook. Her first grandchild was almost completely cropped out of the picture. FML

Today, I finally confronted my mom about how I felt about her three divorces. She then explained that she went through the divorces because I failed to keep the house clean. FML

#21425930
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24733) - you deserved it (2169)

On 06/14/2015 at 1:06pm - misc - by lulumars (woman) - United States

Today, my wife paid a man with a fake crystal and an even faker accent to investigate the creakiness of our apartment complex floors. $300 later, she told me he'd found a "sinkhole of chi energy" and that the building may collapse if we don't pay him to disperse it. I want a divorce. FML

#21425895
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28248) - you deserved it (2970)

On 06/14/2015 at 11:37am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Croatia (Grad Zagreb)

Today, I slept through my alarm and decided to call in sick. After falling back asleep, I woke up to my younger brother robbing my kitchen. It seems he's been doing this for weeks, every time I leave for work. He won't even give it all back. FML

#21425869
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23194) - you deserved it (2081)

On 06/14/2015 at 9:31am - misc - by queenbee - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad has apparently decided that it's too much of a bother to put clothes on when he gets out of bed. He's been walking around in his tighty-whiteys for hours now. FML

#21425446
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21986) - you deserved it (2114)

On 06/13/2015 at 1:10pm - misc - by pantsareathing (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to go thrifting to save some money. Ironically, I ended up having to pay for an emergency trip to the hospital because somebody was too lazy to wash the cat hair off their clothes. I'm severely allergic to cats. FML

#21425208
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22780) - you deserved it (7806)

On 06/12/2015 at 10:41pm - misc - by alyssaamarante - United States (New York)

Today, I was rear-ended. While I was yelling, "WHAT THE F..." the lady who hit me completely freaked out and drove into me again. Twice. FML

#21425087
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25953) - you deserved it (2043)

On 06/12/2015 at 5:09pm - misc - by BrakesNotBumpers (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend forgot to pick our son up from daycare. His excuse? Fighting in a battle in World of Warcraft was far more important and he had to stay absolutely focused. Our son had to wait for two hours. FML

#21424976
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29096) - you deserved it (4517)

On 06/12/2015 at 12:51pm - misc - by poor baby - Germany

Today, my friends decided to throw a going away party because I'm moving. It would have been great if I had actually been invited. FML

#21424928
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26309) - you deserved it (2025)

On 06/12/2015 at 10:25am - misc - by rcarn - United States (Virginia)

Today, an ultrasound tech complimented me on my "exceptionally full bladder". That's probably the best compliment I've received this week. FML

#21424908
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23495) - you deserved it (2073)

On 06/12/2015 at 9:02am - misc - by Jules7594 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to use the bathroom really badly in a drug store. After I did a #2, just as I realized the handle on the toilet was broken, a knock came at the door. I tried fixing it for ten minutes, before slipping out the door, to come face to face with two employees coming to fix the toilet. FML

#21424715
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26027) - you deserved it (2300)

On 06/11/2015 at 10:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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