Thief, Stealing, Coffee, Tea and Work: Whoops

Whoops

By Anonymous - 12/11/2010 12:07 - Sweden

Today, I was late for work and got chewed out by my boss. To console myself I decided to drink a cup of coffee and a cup of tea. My work provides this for free. When I did, my boss told me that in fact it wasn't, nor has it ever been, free; all this time I've been stealing other people's coffee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 876

You deserved it 32 632

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Same thing different taste

By koletatlow19 - 05/03/2010 05:23 - Canada

Today, my boss fired me because I "didn't get the right kind of coffee beans." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 061

You deserved it 3 838

By jaym42013 - 22/07/2016 19:29 - United States - Clovis

Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had to stop at Starbucks to get my boss a drink. His son, who is at least 30 minutes late to work every day, was just walking in as I was walking out with all of my stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 877

You deserved it 1 112

By Anonymous - 03/05/2015 05:58 - Finland

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 469

You deserved it 5 060

Life ain't a TV show

By StarbucksGirl - 16/12/2022 18:00

Today, I did the walk of shame at work after walking in 20 minutes late with a venti iced coffee in my hand for the umpteenth time, my boss then told me to pack up all my things and get out so I could have all the time in the world to get iced coffees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 4 085

By Anonymous - 13/07/2013 21:10 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 001

You deserved it 4 422

By wrongtarget - 21/10/2009 05:40 - United States

Today, I got chewed out at work when my supervisor showed up, because my coworkers told my supervisor they couldn't find me for an hour and a half. Why couldn't they find me? Because they'd left to go get coffee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 474

You deserved it 2 226

For science

By Rach - 26/10/2023 04:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was making some tea for my colleagues when I accidentally dropped the tea bag into my cup of coffee. I thought, "Why not?" and took a sip. It tasted like a caffeinated botanical disaster, and the whole office got to enjoy me retch for 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 208

You deserved it 679

Drunken lout

By whippingpost - 08/03/2020 04:56

Today, I learned a co-worker called and awoke my boss at 3 a.m. to complain that I'd been "rude" to him. All I'd done was make a disapproving face because he'd been drinking and he was slobbering drunk, and wanted to charge his purchase to his employee account, a definite no-no when not on the clock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 549

You deserved it 123

By lisa321 - 02/04/2009 02:36 - United States

Today, I went to Starbucks to get coffee. The employees told me that there was no more coffee. I started cursing at them and told them that I am in a really big hurry, and that I need coffee every day. They had been yelling back the whole time. Little did I realize, they were saying April Fool's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 519

You deserved it 116 429

By person - 20/09/2015 23:57 - United States - League City

Today, I accidentally fell asleep at work after working a 12-hour shift. Instead of waking me up, my coworkers spiked my coffee mug with whiskey and told my boss I was drunk. My boss wouldn't even listen to my side of the story and fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 676

You deserved it 2 986

perdix 29

Friday 12 November 2010 16:12

Coffee AND tea?!?! Quit screwing around and just go get some crystal meth!

gusgus36 5

Friday 12 November 2010 16:17

oops! that sucks... you would think it would have been more obvious if it wasn't free. or maybe it is free and your boss is just coming up with more ways to wreck your day.. :(

Comments

machiko_fml 0

Friday 12 November 2010 16:32

It really could have been worse.

Jimboom 11

Friday 12 November 2010 16:34

When you assume it makes an ass out of u and me. YDI for stealing.

mintcar 9

Friday 12 November 2010 16:36

This isn't too bad. Your boss didn't fire you. And stop drinking other peoples coffee. Sheesh.

rhm2084 1

Friday 12 November 2010 16:38

water FTW

ROFLBERRYPIE 0

Friday 12 November 2010 16:58

Yeah OP probably posted the FML using someone elses wireless signal. YDI Hobo.

yewzd 0

Friday 12 November 2010 17:11

Well, you must work at sone shitty place if you have to pay for the coffee.

prettyricky2010 0

Friday 12 November 2010 17:12

I mean least you've been getting free coffee, brah

spatz447 3

Friday 12 November 2010 17:14

Bring coffee and give it to others.

funzcpl 0

Friday 12 November 2010 17:33

I thought of the same nice gesture, but figured docbastard would call me a "kiss ass"lol.

DocBastard 38

Friday 12 November 2010 19:31

Why would I say that? I've never called anyone here an ass-kisser. Moron? Yes. Idiot? Countless times. Snookums? Once. I don't want to talk about it.

funzcpl 0

Friday 12 November 2010 17:31

how long have you been working there?

TomasT 0

Friday 12 November 2010 17:55

Då vet vi vem som får pröjsa för kaffet några månader framöver... Haha... stackare!

TomasT 0

Friday 12 November 2010 18:32

It did comply. If you don't want a foreign language, rewrite your rules. It was just in the OP's native language. You could have just babelfished or google translated it if you were worried. Rule: * We're americans and don't speak anything than our version of english. Use a language as close to this as possible. Sheesh!

DocBastard 38

Friday 12 November 2010 23:15

Tomas, don't be naive. This isn't an American English language website, it's French. And most of the mods aren't American either. If you look around, you'll see a lot of "spilt" and "mum" comments from your Aussie and British colleagues. Try to be a little more understanding. Cheerio!