Money: Today, someone caused over $400 worth of damage by breaking into... - FML

By Anonymous - 28/02/2012 19:41 - United States

Today, someone caused over $400 worth of damage by breaking into my car, just to steal $8 worth of beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 120

You deserved it 3 234

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Same thing different taste

By Potato_Lord - 12/11/2015 04:11 - United States - Madison

Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 776

You deserved it 1 469

By jsyn - 09/11/2013 23:27 - United States - East Hampton

Today, somebody broke into my car, just to steal the obviously fake $1,000,000 bill hanging from my rear-view mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 075

You deserved it 11 970

Loot

By ScrewedForCheapBag - 14/03/2013 08:52 - United States - Sacramento

Today, my car got broken into. A small folded plastic bag and a few toothpicks I got from a restaurant were stolen. It's going to cost me a few hundred bucks to fix and clean my car over a 10 cent bag and a few free toothpicks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 491

You deserved it 2 624

By lance - 12/03/2010 12:10 - Canada

Today, I parked my car to go inside to grab my wallet than I'd forgotten. In the short time it took me to do that, someone broke two of my car's windows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 300

You deserved it 2 485

By Animal_aide - 07/01/2010 18:42 - Canada

Today, I got my car back from the repair shop. After paying $400 for them to fix the scratches on the driver's side door, some one decided to key both sides of my car while I was on my lunch break from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 035

You deserved it 2 961

By amayasoma - 12/08/2013 18:54 - United States - Houma

Today, I went to my car to get a few things, when I discovered it had been broken into. Nothing of value was taken. My window was busted in just for a pack of cigarettes, a lighter, and my car's ashtray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 636

You deserved it 7 022

By stop thief - 26/06/2014 15:11 - United States - Aurora

Today, someone stole my laptop from my car. However, they were nice enough to relock the doors after they smashed in the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 033

You deserved it 6 092

Very smart

By Leauge - 28/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Owensboro

Today, I woke up to find out my house was robbed. He didn't steal anything of value, but he stole my beer, dog, and cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 430

You deserved it 302

Clean-freak criminal

By Bryce - 13/06/2021 04:00

Today, some dumbass broke one of my car's windows to steal the pack of disinfecting wipes I just bought a few hours ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 64

Angry much?

By NeedANewWindshield - 24/08/2019 14:00

Today, some unprovoked drunk asshole tried punching a hole through the windshield of my car. While I was driving it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 604

You deserved it 96

Next

Top comments

bbedlock_fml 7

Wednesday 29 February 2012 0:16

ALWAYS hide your beer!

hthelittleone 10

Wednesday 29 February 2012 0:15

Some people..

Comments

KRiddle 15

Wednesday 29 February 2012 4:11

Damn, I'm sorry.

harof1c 0

Wednesday 29 February 2012 4:15

That is some ****** up shit. Hope you get your window fixed

Awsumuzzie 12

Wednesday 29 February 2012 4:17

I wish I could thumb this up more than once!

MrsUresti 8

Wednesday 29 February 2012 4:33

Oh that totally sucks sorry OP man people nowadays!!!!

stormchaser24 24

Wednesday 29 February 2012 4:35

This happens everyday

haydent_fml 3

Wednesday 29 February 2012 5:37

The worst part of this is... they were dumb enough to break in just to steal Pabst Blue Ribbon. And op why do you have alcohol in plain sight in your car?

vturbz91 0

Wednesday 29 February 2012 5:41

Someone did that to me for a pack of smokes that had 3 left

Orgasms 4

Wednesday 29 February 2012 6:03

"I don't always drink but when I do, I cause $400 worth of damage just to get more beer."

longdislover 0

Wednesday 29 February 2012 6:13

Kids these days tisk tisk

gonad_gobbler 1

Wednesday 29 February 2012 6:18

Did the guy who broke into your car have a beerd?

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The Top

Today, I went to work early and saw my crush's car in the parking lot, so I parked next to her. After that, I looked over at her car to see her staring at me with a weird look and her saying, "Really?" Then she gestured around the lot; I looked around to find it completely empty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 635

You deserved it 7 949

Today, I summoned up the courage to tell my crush how I've felt about her for the past two years. I really poured out my heart and soul, and she nodded and smiled throughout. Once I'd finished, she told me that she believes "sex is unnatural", and that she could never date a guy who wanted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 278

You deserved it 4 534

The Top

Today, my mom took me to an AA meeting because she said I needed help. I have never tried alcohol in my life, and told them this. I was then harangued by the "instructor" because apparently one of the signs of alcoholism is denial. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 693

You deserved it 3 058

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the second time. He's really nice, but he's terrible in bed. He busted a nut 3 times before I could orgasm once, and he can't finger to make up for it. His foreplay is trash. I'm starting to lose feelings for him because of the lack of sexual satisfaction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 966

You deserved it 854

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation where I had no internet whatsoever. I turned on my phone to get notifications, hoping to see a message or two that I'd missed while gone. There was 1 notification, telling me how many FMLs were posted while I was away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 164

You deserved it 3 342

Today, I moved in with my friend and her husband so we can be roommates during school. Today is also the day they decided to get a divorce. It's going to be a long year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 998

You deserved it 252

Today, a riot broke out while I was on shift at the community swimming pool. A family snuck in soap so they could use the pool as a giant bath tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 520

You deserved it 2 782

Today, I found out my dentist is retiring. This wouldn't be that big of a deal except that if we want to transfer our dental records to a new dentist we have to do it before he retires and there's a $30 processing fee per person. Three of us use that dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 80