Health: Today, I lied to the treadmill about my weight. FML - FML

By Holly - 05/02/2010 07:33 - United States

Today, I lied to the treadmill about my weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 776

You deserved it 35 263

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/04/2011 13:56 - United Kingdom

Today, I lied to my diary about my weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 178

You deserved it 51 630

By Anonymous - 23/11/2009 09:54 - United States

Today, I went onto the treadmill at my gym. When it prompted me to enter my age I put 27. I'm 29 and am lying about my age to a workout machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 733

You deserved it 38 800

Liar !

By Anonymous - 14/03/2020 09:00

Today, I lied and told my friends I was a compulsive liar. Well, I think I lied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 1 262

Fitness is overrated

By Frankie says relax - 10/12/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. As I was on the treadmill, I accidentally hit the emergency stop button. In my attempt to play it cool, I tried to pretend it was intentional and yelled, "I've reached my fitness goal for the day!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 654

By idefka - 08/04/2017 02:00

Today, I found myself lying to my diary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 510

You deserved it 1 850

By anonymous - 24/06/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 691

You deserved it 5 218

By Anonymous - 18/01/2015 16:34 - Ireland

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 957

You deserved it 20 682

By Anonymous - 05/01/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 059

You deserved it 36 575

By notsosexygirl - 21/02/2009 09:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I was doing my usual routine at the gym which consists of working out on the treadmills right in front of my ex boyfriend to make him feel bad. Whilst doing this, I tried to be cool and do that thing where as the treadmill slows down you turn around and just walk off the end. I fell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 072

You deserved it 68 570

Health is overrated

By Anonymous - 16/03/2022 12:00

Today, trying to get into shape because I run out of breath after walking more than 30 minutes, I started to hit the gym. Too bad my legs didn’t want to cooperate and decided that it would cause limping-worthy pain for every step I took on the treadmill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 182

Next

Top comments

abcdefghiloveyou 0

Friday 5 February 2010 16:09

YDI, it's not like it'll judge you.

Cthulu 0

Friday 5 February 2010 16:08

I bet it laughed at you and told you to lay off the Krispy Kremes. There are some lies that just can't be tolerated, even by a treadmill.

Comments

danibrook010 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 3:14

shoot give her some confidence dang its hard for a woman to lose weight there is no need for being mean to someone who may or may not feel comfortable bout her weight ( not saying that i am big) but there is no need to be a jerk on here to everybody when they have something that is or isnt a FML for God's sake ppl grow up.

likeomgwhat 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 4:23

hey hows it gonna know?

serenaaaa_fml 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 4:44

this would be better on MLIA

sadmcphee 0

Monday 8 February 2010 6:06

Why, afraid it'd make fun of you? besides, you need to put in your correct weight, or it might give you the wrong exercise time or whatever, idk, i just lift weights

DarDarAttack 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 1:54

I know a way that you can get rid of all that stomach fat and look great! HAVE THAT DAMN BABY AND GET A SPRAY TAN. ... Works in as little as 1 week!

higglebiggle 0

Tuesday 23 February 2010 10:53

Ew. Spray tan? Fake and bake is NEVER attractive. Gag. Most people do it wrong and come out like orange oompa lompas or bad ganguros. XDDD

blackhearts 2

Monday 15 February 2010 5:04

aww, its not lying! it's positive visualization! good fer you for going to the gym. soon you will type that number in and it'll be true! :D

Teenybopper13 0

Sunday 1 August 2010 3:25

Why Did We All assume OP was fat?? whats To Say that maybe they have an eating disorder or a wieght obsession and just want to be smaller than their normal body. And further more the average size in the USA is 12. so go eat a hamburger and shut up.

KessyKandi 0

Sunday 9 January 2011 17:29

Aww the only way you'll learn to accept yourself is being honest! I highly doubt you are fat, I've met very few people who I've thought, 'Ew, you're fat and you deserved it'.

hdake27 0

Thursday 14 April 2011 22:18

I have done that. it's sad:/

123ilovejustinb 12

Saturday 22 October 2011 6:19

I did the same thing in gym class

4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Birthday Money Cute Kids Weird Awkward Love Health Abuse Relatable Social Media Scams Education Parents School Anger issues Teenagers Family Relationship advice Capitalism Miscellaneous Public freakouts Grieving Mental health Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I was at the hairdresser's getting a trim. The lady doing my hair commented on how beautiful and luscious my hair was, which made me feel really good. I later overheard her telling her colleague that hair as nice as mine was wasted on someone with a face like mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 027

You deserved it 3 364

Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 871

You deserved it 43 967

The Top

Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 581

You deserved it 7 311

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 810

You deserved it 6 278

Today, I learned the hard way not to keep my own cash in my pocket while working as a cashier, when I was forced to give $30 to a scamming customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 441

You deserved it 2 879

Today, I realized the reason I was asked to babysit 3 weeks ago for Feb 14 was because the old married couple with kids safely assumed that I wouldn't have a Valentine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 593

You deserved it 3 116

Today, I tried having some girl time with my mom so I could sneakily figure out what to get her for her birthday. All I could think of in the end was a time machine, after her rant about wishing she'd gotten her tubes tied rather than going through the stress of raising me and my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 263

You deserved it 961

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 375

You deserved it 7 424