Miscellaneous: Today, I found myself lying to my diary. FML

By idefka - 08/04/2017 02:00

Today, I found myself lying to my diary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 510

You deserved it 1 850

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/04/2011 13:56 - United Kingdom

Today, I lied to my diary about my weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 178

You deserved it 51 630

Liar !

By Anonymous - 14/03/2020 09:00

Today, I lied and told my friends I was a compulsive liar. Well, I think I lied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 1 262

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 06:07 - United States - Cottonwood

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 513

You deserved it 4 583

By Holly - 05/02/2010 07:33 - United States

Today, I lied to the treadmill about my weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 776

You deserved it 35 263

By Emptyspace - 25/06/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 606

You deserved it 4 182

By indian:( - 18/01/2009 21:57 - United States

Today, I realized that I hate lying to my mom about having a boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 002

You deserved it 33 111

By ughh - 22/11/2011 13:22 - United States

Today, my mom read my diary. Then she frantically booked me an appointment with a psychiatrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 105

You deserved it 5 902

Betrayal

By sisterly love - 14/08/2013 21:13 - United States - Santa Clara

Today, my sister admitted to selling pages of my diary to my old boyfriends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 200

You deserved it 4 152

By Anonymous - 22/12/2013 06:17 - United States - Roseville

Today, I was helping my mom look for some money she'd misplaced. At my wit's end, I flipped through her diary, in case she'd hidden it between the pages as she has before. Didn't find the money, but I did find out she might well be cheating on my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 393

You deserved it 8 300

By ugh - 05/06/2010 23:49 - Canada

Today, my dad found and read my diary. Most of the entries were about how my father didn't respect my privacy. Then he phoned my aunt and read her passages from it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 870

You deserved it 3 907

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 8 April 2017 3:51

Call it "fan fiction" and you'll be ok. Of course, being a fan of yourself is another mental illness.

Dave_Davington 33

Saturday 8 April 2017 3:46

So, did it buy it?

Comments

Dave_Davington 33

Saturday 8 April 2017 3:46

So, did it buy it?

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 8 April 2017 3:51

Call it "fan fiction" and you'll be ok. Of course, being a fan of yourself is another mental illness.

species4872 19

Saturday 8 April 2017 7:46

And now you're like most other people.

AnthonyCS5 19

Saturday 8 April 2017 8:06

We always want our lives to seem more interesting than they really are! Lol!

Allie614032 34

Saturday 8 April 2017 9:35

Why bother even keeping a diary if you're not going to write honestly?

Keywords

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Today, I began noticing a certain female name popping up on my husband’s social media notifications,so I asked him about it. He got irrationally upset at the fact that I pronounced her name wrong, told me she’s “nobody”, then said, “I hate it when you accuse me of shit!” I didn’t even accuse him of anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 76

Today, I took a girl on a date. This girl is tiny, about 4 ft 10 and petite. She ordered a 16 inch pizza, garlic bread, wings, fries, and multiple drinks, and damn if she didn’t eat every bite of it, it was impressive. Until we were screwing later and she vomited the whole meal down my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 535

You deserved it 164

The Top

Today, we buried my mom. I walked past my sister's husband just in time to hear him mutter: "Hope the fire's nice and hot down there, you old hag." I told my sister. She wouldn't believe me and accused me of trying to start drama. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 262

You deserved it 2 687

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 561

You deserved it 3 443

Today, while studying for a big test at the library, some idiots started playing hide-and-seek. After putting up with their snorting and giggling for nearly an hour, I finally lost my shit and told them to knock it off. I then got kicked out for causing a disturbance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 855

You deserved it 3 969

Today, it’s Easter Sunday. I have a countdown timer on my phone for when I can retire. I checked it : only 666 days left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 729

You deserved it 201

Today, I asked my mom if she wanted to go wedding dress shopping with me today. She reluctantly said, "I guess…" I showered, shaved, and did my hair and makeup. When I came downstairs, she hadn't even brushed her teeth yet. "I'm just lacking motivation to go," she said. Glad you're so excited too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 460

You deserved it 1 598

Today, I accidentally covfefe

I agree, your life sucks 2 868

You deserved it 1 598

Same thing different taste

Liar !

Betrayal

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