Kids: Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not...

By hairless - 09/10/2011 03:53 - Canada

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 441

You deserved it 6 771

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Same thing different taste

By thatoneperson - 17/02/2012 12:43 - United States

Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 423

You deserved it 5 899

By TimeForAHairCut - 08/06/2012 23:44 - United States - Eugene

Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 988

You deserved it 2 106

By my dumb bro - 17/04/2013 16:13 - United States - Gillham

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 398

You deserved it 8 763

By Anonymous - 23/08/2009 19:41 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my little brother. He was looking at me and says "so cool." I asked him what was so cool and he says "it's not that cool but, your eyebrow connects to your other eyebrow". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 162

You deserved it 13 383

He has issues

By just a joke - 08/06/2020 20:08

Today, I playfully drew thick eyebrows on my one-year-old son to make him look like a cartoon villain. He laughed cutely in the mirror as I took some adorable pictures. When my husband saw, he threw such a horrendous fit about boys and makeup, I was reduced to tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 665

You deserved it 363

By Alex - 26/03/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 194

You deserved it 76 832

By yeah_im_mad_bro - 24/09/2011 00:32 - Canada

Today, it's been a week since my little brother took up his new hobby of posting "cool story, bro" in reply to almost every Facebook status and comment that I make. Not only do I already want to smash his face against a brick wall, my parents will ground me if I defriend any family members. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 202

You deserved it 5 465

By Christine - 09/05/2009 06:08 - United States

Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" In a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 993

You deserved it 51 193

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 430

You deserved it 28 100

By vreenya - 08/04/2014 20:13 - Chile - Santiago

Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 606

You deserved it 4 038

Freeze_fml 16

Sunday 9 October 2011 9:09

Someone answered their own question.

_Vamp_ 9

Sunday 9 October 2011 10:04

And you can't either gangsta beiber. It's past your bed time you silly goose.

Comments

iggz 0

Sunday 9 October 2011 17:27

lol, the only right thing to do is shave his too, and then both go walk around town

bizarre_ftw 21

Sunday 9 October 2011 18:24

Show him that you're not joking when you threaten to trade him in for a new & better adopted brother

ohmandapants 16

Sunday 9 October 2011 18:59

Kids are the future...of all that is evil.

bms1996 12

Sunday 9 October 2011 22:31

better get an eyebrow pencil!!

MrLoux 6

Monday 10 October 2011 0:30

Hang him from his thumbs!

fadingfaith 4

Monday 10 October 2011 1:56

Get bangs and draw them back in.

bunnixbrutality 5

Monday 10 October 2011 2:50

Op if i didnt get my adventure time in and i was him i would have shaved more then your eyebrows D;

divine69 0

Monday 10 October 2011 3:40

Get him back, Wax his eyebrows

TheWindowLicker 13

Monday 10 October 2011 3:47

59- sounds like courage the cowardly dog to me, but I could be mistaken.

swampbilly 5

Monday 10 October 2011 4:45

I'd Bruce lee kick em in the chest

Keywords

Video games Gamers Annoying Birthday Money Cute Kids Love Health Weird Awkward Abuse Relatable Social Media Scams Parents School Education Anger issues Teenagers Family Capitalism Miscellaneous Relationship advice Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, my best friend’s girlfriend took his phone and blocked me on Facebook, all because I wrote him a heartfelt Happy Birthday message on his wall. I found out because he messaged me from another account explaining what happened. She refuses to understand that we’re strictly platonic friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 137

Today, I threw an elaborate surprise birthday party for my boyfriend of four years. He thought we were going to a quiet dinner but when we arrived, thirty of his friends jumped out and surprised him. Instead of kissing me to thank me, he broke up with me because of how easily I had lied to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 721

You deserved it 4 756

The Top

Problem Solving 101

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 106

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 591

You deserved it 7 452

Today, my boyfriend tried to confront me about my “drinking problem”. He claims that the last time he was at my place, I had a full bottle of rum and now it’s gone. He hasn’t spent the night at my house in over two months and it was a half bottle of Malibu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 913

You deserved it 101

Today, my brother met my girlfriend for the first time. Instead of making a good first impression, the first thing he did was talk about how he just took a massive dump and didn't wipe very well, and that's why his hand smelled bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 280

You deserved it 247

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 870

You deserved it 276

Today, my kids thought it would be funny to put pictures of naked men and women as people's ID on my phone. They won't tell me how to change it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 072

You deserved it 30 760

Same thing different taste

He has issues

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