Kids: Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not...

By hairless - 09/10/2011 03:53 - Canada

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 441

You deserved it 6 771

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

By thatoneperson - 17/02/2012 12:43 - United States

Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 423

You deserved it 5 899

By TimeForAHairCut - 08/06/2012 23:44 - United States - Eugene

Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 988

You deserved it 2 106

By my dumb bro - 17/04/2013 16:13 - United States - Gillham

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 398

You deserved it 8 763

By Anonymous - 23/08/2009 19:41 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my little brother. He was looking at me and says "so cool." I asked him what was so cool and he says "it's not that cool but, your eyebrow connects to your other eyebrow". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 162

You deserved it 13 383

He has issues

By just a joke - 08/06/2020 20:08

Today, I playfully drew thick eyebrows on my one-year-old son to make him look like a cartoon villain. He laughed cutely in the mirror as I took some adorable pictures. When my husband saw, he threw such a horrendous fit about boys and makeup, I was reduced to tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 665

You deserved it 363

By Alex - 26/03/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 194

You deserved it 76 832

By yeah_im_mad_bro - 24/09/2011 00:32 - Canada

Today, it's been a week since my little brother took up his new hobby of posting "cool story, bro" in reply to almost every Facebook status and comment that I make. Not only do I already want to smash his face against a brick wall, my parents will ground me if I defriend any family members. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 202

You deserved it 5 465

By Christine - 09/05/2009 06:08 - United States

Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" In a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 993

You deserved it 51 193

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 430

You deserved it 28 100

By vreenya - 08/04/2014 20:13 - Chile - Santiago

Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 606

You deserved it 4 038

Freeze_fml 16

Sunday 9 October 2011 9:09

Someone answered their own question.

_Vamp_ 9

Sunday 9 October 2011 10:04

And you can't either gangsta beiber. It's past your bed time you silly goose.

Comments

KnucklesDeep 5

Sunday 9 October 2011 14:16

Teach him you're not joking when you promise to beat the shit out of him for it.

ikickgingers 15

Sunday 9 October 2011 15:55

7 - you are always so freaking nice. I don't know if the rainbows shooting out of your ass is making me slightly nauseated or slightly turned on. :/

mrmrmrman 6

Sunday 9 October 2011 16:20

courage the cowardly dog reference?

thrAsHeRr9081 16

Monday 10 October 2011 1:30

Courage the cowardly dog!

exleonhart 0

Monday 10 October 2011 2:35

59- "total defluffication!"

trefizzle24 1

Monday 10 October 2011 5:30

I don't get it haha

rexreta 5

Sunday 9 October 2011 14:26

My first reaction... O.O !!!

Buttsexpirate 9

Sunday 9 October 2011 14:36

He was very nauuughty. (A cookie from my personal hidden stash for whoever gets the reference)

superguppy19 3

Sunday 9 October 2011 14:53

Now your an emotionless bastard lol

tinkerbell2oo8 4

Sunday 9 October 2011 15:22

wow only thing u need to do now is shave ur head and u will look like the cone heads

rawrkittyrawr 6

Sunday 9 October 2011 15:44

I rather not know where you keep your hidden cookie stash :D

ikickgingers 15

Sunday 9 October 2011 16:02

59- if its not python... Idk but I want a cookie!!!

alival 12

Sunday 9 October 2011 16:10

Well the drawn on look is kinda in right now

naddification 7

Sunday 9 October 2011 16:12

FYL VERY MUCH :O

hurtandabused 7

Sunday 9 October 2011 17:19

Do the same to him!

Keywords

Dreams Jealousy Love Gamers Video games Geek Parents Family Kids AITA Animals Relatable Gun control Money Amazon Annoying Birthday Cute Weird Awkward Health Abuse Social Media Scams Miscellaneous Friends Mysterious Education School Teenagers

The Top

Today, I was at the hairdresser's getting a trim. The lady doing my hair commented on how beautiful and luscious my hair was, which made me feel really good. I later overheard her telling her colleague that hair as nice as mine was wasted on someone with a face like mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 027

You deserved it 3 364

Today, I found out that my toxic mother-in-law's retirement plans include moving in with us when she gets old. The death glares I’m getting from my wife right now are so worth the satisfaction I got from telling that evil old bat I’d burn the house down first before I let her move into it with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 71

The Top

Today, my gallstones flared up so badly an ambulance was called. I needed the strongest painkillers they could supply and had even more at the hospital. When my boyfriend came to visit me, instead of comforting words, he told me that "being kicked in the balls is still worse". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 069

You deserved it 304

Today, almost every girl in my contacts thinks I’m sexually unattractive, and one even said I’m "too nice.” The one girl that is sexually attracted to me only wants me for sex, and wants nothing else to do with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 307

Today, I was having the "sex talk" with my mom because I really want to have sex with my boyfriend. My dad overheard us and is sulking. The only reason he hasn’t said anything like, “I’ll kill the boy” or, “Not until you’re married” is because he’s scared of my mom. Now everything is awkward at home FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 028

You deserved it 303

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 954

You deserved it 3 925

Today, I babysat a four year-old kid, so his parents could go out to party. Once in bed, he yelled, "I want to go party!" After three or four times, I told him to go to sleep. Two hours later, he'd wet the bed, saying, "I told you I want to go potty!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 989

You deserved it 52 302

Today, a furious woman stormed into my job, demanding to know why I fired her precious baby boy. I explained that watching porn on the clock is grounds for termination. She screamed that I was lying about him and that she’ll see me in court for slandering him. I had to call the cops to make her leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 266

You deserved it 78

Same thing different taste

He has issues

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