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Today, I took the biggest, most excruciatingly painful crap of my life. It was so bad that I couldn't walk straight for a good 20 minutes afterwards. Long enough for my boyfriend to film me limping around and post the clip to Facebook with the caption "#anal ftw ;)". FML

#21379420
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29898) - you deserved it (3537)

On 03/22/2015 at 10:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

KhazKhazz's comment : Your boyfriend is a pain in the ass

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Today, my mom got drunk and started crying at my after-wedding party, after promising she'd behave herself. She thinks my husband is an awful person who'll drag me into a life of sin, all because he has a tattoo and an ear piercing. FML

#21379352
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26579) - you deserved it (2451)

On 03/22/2015 at 5:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Unrecognisable's comment : So much hate against tattoos and piercings like it somehow represents who the person is on the inside. Horrible.

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Today, a girl asked me to check out her left breast, which she said she'd found a strange lump on. I'm an orthodontist. FML

#21379225
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27544) - you deserved it (2983)

On 03/22/2015 at 12:03am - health - by noway - United States (California)

MELKOZAR's comment : Sheesh! Don't complain!

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Today, I mentioned to my mum that one of my friends is pregnant. She decided I was lying, that I'm the one who's actually pregnant, and that I'm going to get checked out by a doctor. FML

#21379171
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28557) - you deserved it (2290)

On 03/21/2015 at 10:27pm - health - by ellabellabooboo - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my father decided it would be a good idea to give me the sex talk, at Target, at the top of his lungs. FML

#21379134
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (542) - you deserved it (2464)

On 03/21/2015 at 9:04pm - misc - by tobuscus9412 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went out with two friends for lunch. The van we took ran out of fuel, so we pushed it to a nearby gas station, a gas station suffering from a gas shortage. FML

#21379106
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (366) - you deserved it (2977)

On 03/21/2015 at 8:07pm - misc - by van no gough (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was startled by my roommate marching a drunk man out of our apartment. Somehow he found his way in complete darkness into the bathroom without alerting me or my dog next to the only door. He mistook the clothes hamper for the toilet. FML

Today, it's been a week since I was dumped. I planned to stay at my apartment, cry and eat chocolate in peace. My roommate decided to have loud sex with her boyfriend in the apartment. She refused to quiet down, saying "My body, my rules." FML

#21379056
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28600) - you deserved it (3552)

On 03/21/2015 at 5:59pm - intimacy - by stoprubbingitinmyface (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at my Mandarin teacher's house. I had diarrhoea and had to go to the toilet. My mum texted me while I was still in the toilet saying, "We all heard you". FML

#21378919
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27288) - you deserved it (2235)

On 03/21/2015 at 12:47pm - misc - by poop - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, because I thought I was about to have an asthma attack, I had a panic attack. Then, the panic attack caused me to have a real asthma attack. FML

#21378889
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27918) - you deserved it (3586)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:14am - health - by pikachu_43 - United States (California)

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

#21378887
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28606) - you deserved it (3408)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:12am - misc - by ajodasdojsad (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I overheard my dickhead dad telling my girlfriend she's too good for me, then asking if she wants to settle for someone like me. FML

#21378798
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27861) - you deserved it (2192)

On 03/21/2015 at 4:55am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, my sister shot my dog with my airsoft gun. When I told my parents, she put on the fakest sobbing I've ever heard, said she didn't even know how to use a gun, and that she saw me shoot my own dog. They believed her and think I need psychiatric help. FML

#21378741
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31421) - you deserved it (1986)

On 03/21/2015 at 1:36am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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