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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend in the dark, he grabbed onto a fat roll and asked, "Is this your stomach or boob?" I didn't have the heart to tell him it was a back roll. FML

#13741680
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22979) - you deserved it (25561)

On 11/06/2010 at 6:37pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that a street performer makes more money than I do. I have a full time job at the bank. FML

#13740826
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28771) - you deserved it (3846)

On 11/06/2010 at 5:08pm - money - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at my cousin's baby shower, there was a discussion on what to name the baby. When the name Jacqueline was brought up, I made a face and exclaimed, "Ugh, I hate that name!" I was then informed that's the name of my cousin's mother-in-law. She definitely heard me. FML

#13738756
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9766) - you deserved it (26167)

On 11/06/2010 at 1:58pm - misc - by Username - France

Today, my boyfriend ditched me, saying he had some important things to do. When I checked on him a while later, I found out what was so "important". A game called Robot Unicorn Attack. FML

#13738415
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28153) - you deserved it (9236)

On 11/06/2010 at 1:24pm - love - by anonymous_0505 (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me freak out and fall into my outdoors pool. The water was so cold that I started hyperventilating. My brother left to "get help". I finally managed to get out, and found him watching TV. FML

#13736205
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30501) - you deserved it (5358)

On 11/06/2010 at 7:45am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was playing with my four month old daughter, flying her in the air like an airplane. I open my mouth saying 'Weeee', and she vomited on my face. FML

#13734047
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28036) - you deserved it (15239)

On 11/06/2010 at 1:18am - kids - by Username - France

Today, my boyfriend bailed on our one year anniversary celebration because his ex girlfriend asked him to go to a wedding with her and pose as her fake boyfriend. FML

#13733818
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42251) - you deserved it (3937)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:52am - love - by iheartexes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work, a woman fainted, and an extremely attractive cop came in to help. I ended up running into him an hour later. Seeing as though I'm not very shy or a nervous person, I struck up a conversation with him, thinking it must be fate. I ended up fumbling my words so much he asked if I was drunk. FML

#13733667
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27275) - you deserved it (7092)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:40am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered the piggy bank I made a Facebook account for has more friends than me. It has 12. FML

#13733621
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26039) - you deserved it (13841)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML

#13733539
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9862) - you deserved it (33098)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was feeling really sick when I was with my boyfriend at the park. When we were walking, I got really dizzy and collapsed. My boyfriend didn't catch me. His mom took me to the hospital. While I was being poked with needles, he was at home playing COD. FML

#13733165
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32616) - you deserved it (4647)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:04am - health - by jamiedevin (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend started his first day of work. After saying our goodbyes, I went into our bedroom to get changed, picked up one of my blouses and found a camera, still recording. I guess someone has major trust issues. FML

#13729555
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29635) - you deserved it (3932)

On 11/05/2010 at 7:36pm - love - by distressed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my twin sister sent a nude picture to her boyfriend, who then forwarded it on to everyone else. Everyone else thinks it's me. FML

#13729352
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38568) - you deserved it (2975)

On 11/05/2010 at 7:17pm - intimacy - by jsquared - United States (California)



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