Miss Pacific NW, USA Single
Today, a customer wanted a military discount for buying two 39 cent Slim Jims. I work at an auto parts store. FML
Today, my financial issues hit a new low when I had to borrow back some of the money I gave the guy who did my hair. FML
Today, I came home to find my parents wearing Santa hats and blasting Christmas music at full volume. So begins three months of hell. FML
Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML
Today, I discovered that I have caught head lice from my son. Unfortunately, they are living in my chest hair. FML
Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think they were more surprised by the box of naughty toys under my bed. FML
Today, my body-building addiction hit a whole new level when I begged my friend to sell me her breast milk. FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML
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