You big fanny
Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML
Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was babysitting some kids and helping them make a poster about insects. They couldn't think of any more insects to add so I suggested a spider, and got told to "not be a dumbass, spiders aren't insects they're arachnids." The girl is six. FML
Today, I asked my 8-year-old daughter to kill a house spider for me. I am a 42-year-old man. FML
Today, my daughter, who can pick up spiders and even snakes without flinching, screamed at the top of her lungs because she saw a mouse. Um, what? FML
Today, I saw a spider. My two year-old knows that I'm afraid of them, but in an attempt to not pass my phobia onto him, I said it was a piece of dirt. Now he thinks that I'm afraid of dirt. I did not think this through. FML
Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML
Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I was with my girlfriend in her room. She starts screaming. Her father bursts in and, thinking I'm some kind of rapist, hits me in the head with a baseball bat. Not bad enough? I wasn't the one making her scream. There was a huge spider on the wall. FML
Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high-pitched voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Naomimi_fml 6
Six year old badass.
MrSassypants 34
Then someone breaks into the house with a gun and she takes 'em out with her bare hands. Stone cold killer that little one is.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (127)
ViQValentine 3
#30.. Please get a life. Don't correct Noor. Her comment was perfect. ******* grammar nazi..
sillyyanks 24
I feel for you OP! I have a phobia of spiders too and however much I force myself to stare at them and get as close to them as possible there is this alarm bell in my head screaming DANGER DANGER DANGER!! THUMBS UP IF YOU HAVE ARACHNOPHOBIA!!!!
annie_nk 23
Alan, we need more people like you on Facebook and YouTube.
heyycurl 4
If you're a guy, it just makes the situation 2x more awkward.
hapy_pig098 13
Hey make that 5x
hapy_pig098 13
Hey make that 5x
momo1972 3
And you write about it on here. Wow your are that stupid
Ren_Uchiha 11
30- would it kill you to just ignore it?, Noor got a comma in the wrong place. It's not a big deal.
Epikouros 32
Haha, little girls are ruthless when they haven't internalized the damsel in distress act yet.
joethebiden 8
If you had submitted this from Australia, I'd say your "stay back" comment made sense and that kid is badass. But Germany? Please. I don't think Germany has come up with baby-eating spiders yet.
forever_born 6
OP-Ahh spider stay back kid! Kid-(walks up) hi spider nice to meet you. Spider meet my shoe! (Squashes spider) stop being such a baby! I think that kid rocks!
jaycooter 0
Good for her as she was absolutely right. I hope you didn't get paid. YDI
stoptrying 9
She shouldn't be paid for being afraid of spiders? Your logic is nearly as terrible as your picture.
BigSexy123 11
**** you, asshole.
scuttlebuttz 1
Because you are being a baby.