Today, I found out that my new roommate got kicked out of his old house because he pulled a gun on his old roommates and threatened them. The reason? They nagged him about dishes he left in the sink. Well, only 10 months left on the lease. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my roommate's girlfriend's best friend. A few hours later, they had me evicted. FML
Today, I found out that, after having moved over 500 miles to begin a post-graduate degree, I'm being kicked out of the house I'm renting. We haven't yet signed agreements. Apparently I "keep the kitchen too clean". FML
Today, my roommate woke me up during afternoon nap to tell me that I need to move out. His reason: "Our political differences will likely escalate to violence." FML
Today, my three housemates got into a huge fight and ended up declaring their undying hatred for each other. They now refuse to talk to each other, and I've become their go-between. Yesterday, we signed the lease for another year in the house together. FML
Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML
Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML
Today, my now ex-boyfriend got us evicted. The lazy prick kept throwing dog poop onto the neighbors' patio instead of disposing it properly. Management told him he could either get rid of the dog or we had to go. My ex refused and slammed the door in his face. The lease is in my name, so my credit is fucked. FML
Today, one of my roommates blew a fuse by running a personal heater on full overnight. I notified our landlady that I had to get a new fuse; she came over to pay me for it. Only as I heard landlady's horn did I see another roommate's girlfriend's car; she stayed overnight and isn't allowed to. Both roomies got evicted and blamed me. FML
Today I knocked on one of my roommate's door and asked her to stop vacuuming since it's was late. She started to record me and went on a tirade about how none of the girls there respect her. She has previously tried to push two girls down the stairs. Her lease isn't up for 4 more months. FML
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Top comments
weepingangel_fml 7
They didn't call the cops on him?
J3R3MYY 14
**** the lease, gtf outa there!!
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Comments (98)
raphanne_fml 33
Wow, this makes Eddie, Joey's roommate, sound like a lovely person and a model of mental health...
hateevryone 15
why didn't he go to jail? that's crazy
theonlysweetpea 10
I have to give it to #27. That was awesome!
thatoneitalian 3
This is where you put your own dishes in the sink, and when he lectures you, YOU pull a gun on HIM.
whited666 0
Why only kicked out? Shouldn't he have been arrested...?
th3hardrocker 12
Run like hell!!!
dubstepfreak123 0
Buy a bigger gun. Then nag him for not starting the dish washer
FlyingWhisps 5
No, no, no, sweety. You got to do it like I do, full background check, find out where he often hangs out, talk to his parents, friends, and old neighbors, then take traces of his DNA. This plan is fool-proof, it works for the FBI.
rallets 23
did you just call another dude sweety?
FlyingWhisps 5
I'm a girl, actually. :)
mattorama 15
When I come to power, anyone who leaves dirty dishes in the sink gets the death penalty. Do people think they wash themselves, or something?
effedml 5
I was HOPIN they would.
effedml 5
HOPING, too. :)
cheefer 0
What kind of gun did he pull? This little morsel of info is impertinent. A pellet gun is drastically different than a shotgun.