Today, I found out that my new roommate got kicked out of his old house because he pulled a gun on his old roommates and threatened them. The reason? They nagged him about dishes he left in the sink. Well, only 10 months left on the lease. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my roommate's girlfriend's best friend. A few hours later, they had me evicted. FML
Today, I found out that, after having moved over 500 miles to begin a post-graduate degree, I'm being kicked out of the house I'm renting. We haven't yet signed agreements. Apparently I "keep the kitchen too clean". FML
Today, my roommate woke me up during afternoon nap to tell me that I need to move out. His reason: "Our political differences will likely escalate to violence." FML
Today, my three housemates got into a huge fight and ended up declaring their undying hatred for each other. They now refuse to talk to each other, and I've become their go-between. Yesterday, we signed the lease for another year in the house together. FML
Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML
Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML
Today, my now ex-boyfriend got us evicted. The lazy prick kept throwing dog poop onto the neighbors' patio instead of disposing it properly. Management told him he could either get rid of the dog or we had to go. My ex refused and slammed the door in his face. The lease is in my name, so my credit is fucked. FML
Today, one of my roommates blew a fuse by running a personal heater on full overnight. I notified our landlady that I had to get a new fuse; she came over to pay me for it. Only as I heard landlady's horn did I see another roommate's girlfriend's car; she stayed overnight and isn't allowed to. Both roomies got evicted and blamed me. FML
Today I knocked on one of my roommate's door and asked her to stop vacuuming since it's was late. She started to record me and went on a tirade about how none of the girls there respect her. She has previously tried to push two girls down the stairs. Her lease isn't up for 4 more months. FML
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Top comments
weepingangel_fml 7
They didn't call the cops on him?
J3R3MYY 14
**** the lease, gtf outa there!!
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Comments (98)
BarrelChick 0
That's why we don't ask random people at Walmart to be our roommate
MyS3lf 24
Your new roommate sounds like my ex. I'd arm myself if I were you, people like that don't see you as a person, and therefore do not give a s**t about what they do to you.
Blueglasscup 18
Well... Just make sure you're the one that washes the dishes from now on!
Snafuusmc 12
Hmm it must have been more than just dishes that set him off.
SpeciakAgtTippy 3
This is why I trained under Goku for six months. No one has the balls to pull a gun on an honorary super saiyan.
Sl1mShad3y 10
Goku said you failed his training
TipOfTheHat 10
Get a bigger gun!
MissBubbley 2
Good luck buddy!!! :(
haiu2323 10
Run fast, run far!!!
perdix 31
Bring a shotgun to any discussion of household chores. You're not going to do his ******* dishes!
drivemysoul19 8
Maybe you should choose someone you know really well for a roommate.