Today, as I was driving back home from my grandma's, I looked over at the guy in the lane beside me, only to witness him with a sandwich between his teeth and his cock in his free hand. Now I know why I don't leave the city, or even drive, more often. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was waiting at a bus stop, a man stopped at the red light and smiled at me. I smiled back. He blew me a kiss and drove away, just as I realized he was masturbating behind the wheel. FML
Today, while driving, I saw a car pull over with its hazard lights on. I went to see if they needed help, only to see the guy was jerking off to something on his phone. FML
Today, while driving, I idly started picking my nose. I looked over at the car next to me and saw a smoking hot guy from my school staring at me in disgust. He kept staring until I took a turn-off. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
Today, I was eating lunch in my car. There was a cute guy, also in his car, who kept smiling at me and winking with a cheeky grin. I considered giving him my number but his girlfriend suddenly sat up from having her head in his lap, wiping her mouth. He was getting a blowjob the entire time. FML
Today, I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my sister. I was happily biting into a burrito, when I saw a man in his car in the restaurant parking lot, staring at us and jacking off. FML
Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML
Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML
Today, I was so horny, I decided to meet up secretly with a guy after having dinner with family. We went for a night drive and he parked somewhere to go down on me. The dude was sucking the life out of my clit, almost biting it off. Good thing my mum called and I had a reason to escape the ordeal. FML
Today, I was driving home when I saw my boyfriend chundering on the side of the road, into an old lady's shopping basket. FML
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Top comments
Redoxx_fml 22
Maybe he wanted a cockmeat sandwich and this was the next best thing.
flashback.miss 28
hopefully he didn't catch you staring and it wasn't too long a traffic stop.
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Comments (51)
Aleys_fml 21
Waar was dit?
Bigbooty233 1
Did you wave?
jefrey 9
theres nothing wrong with that! i witness some girls rubbing downthere while driving...
thaliah 15
Hahaha. It's better to be a homebody. :)
cjrand 7
Maybe they forgot to put mayonnaise?
IXChaosDragonXI 13
Was he steering with his penis?
sanecatlady 13
According to a book I read that is a sign that the person is really a space alien. The theory is that their UFO windows are made from special glass that can't be seen from the outside, and they assume all Earth vehicle windows are the same way. Of course, the book was Bart Simpson's Guide to Life, so it might not have been the most accurate source of information, and it only mentioned things like cleaning out one's nose or ears or singly loudly to music.
buckdharma 38
Let me get this straight. While driving down a street, he beat his meat while trying to eat? While eating on the go, he tried to come as he went? He had to be lost because every time he tried to turn, wouldn't he wind up going straight?
mdw7 12
How exactly did you see his **** in his hand through his car door? Do they make see-through doors there? Because the angle seems wrong for that kind of view.
HalluMihar 8
THIS. Exactly what I was wondering. Is there something OP isn't telling us?
elmatador615 12
Must be some messed up town!