Today, I walked in on one of my co-workers jerking off in the bathroom, complete with heavy breathing and victory groans. I don't want to go to HR, but I can't even look at him anymore. We have to work on a project together next week. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML
Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML
Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML
Today, I caught my coworker masturbating in the bathroom. This was during her shift, while I was mopping the bathroom floors. FML
Today, I walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room of our restaurant. I pretended I didn't see him and quickly closed the door. About five minutes later, he came out, cupped my face in his hands and told me I was getting promoted. I'm happy, but scarred for life. FML
Today, I got incredibly horny at work. No one was in the office, so I spread out on my yoga mat and started to masturbate. All of the sudden, I heard a forklift outside. I quickly tried to hide, but I think the construction worker caught me. He’ll be working here all month. FML
Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML
Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML
Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML
Today, I went over to talk to my boss. I must have snuck up on her because she was masturbating through her pants. She stopped and I had to chat away, pretending I didn't notice. FML
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Top comments
jsan727 17
You should of just stared him in the eyes the entire time. You know, to establish dominance.
Zelphoric 25
Sounds like he's working pretty hard.
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Comments (88)
FelicityWishes 32
Pretend it didn't happen? He is probably just as uncomfortable as you are.
buckdharma 38
What if he just was having a hard time making a dookie? You read into things too much op.
trucker2 33
Assuming we are all adults here - no need to run to HR- he didn't vocalize the need for you to lend a hand..... Spontaneous combustion at its best
mercyelvira42 23
A few questions: 1) Was the bathroom a single occupant bathroom? 2) If so, why didn't you knock before entering? 3) If it was a bathroom with several stalls, did he have the stall door open?
TheRussianNavy 11
Did he even open a stall? I assume so (in which case ignore that). Or was he jacking off outside the stall...Like a weirdo...
TheRussianNavy 11
I bet you love your co-worker...
914smv 18
Maybe talk to him? and tell him you are really uncomfortable with working with him OP
Ayasha_fml 12
Sounds like a hard thing to deal with to be sure. I'm not sure how your work runs OP, but is it possible to leave an anonymous note about what happened to HR?
willsnow18 11
it may be a hard decision to make
rockydify 22
I'm sure OP will come to a decision soon.
rockydify 22
I'm sure OP will come to a decision soon.
munetosiyamada 7
Then ask him, how did it go?
tlnorman 18
No self control eh? Can't wait to get to the privacy of his own home to do his private business has to do it while at work. Sorry you had to see that I would go to HR if it were me that sort of thing is inappropriate and not a good use of company time. You don't need to be made to feel uncomfortable at work.
pks2014 10
People have strange fetishes who knows ..