Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend, who recently started French classes, and I were having sex. Knowing how whispering in my ear turns me on, she whispered something in French, and I came. Later I found out it meant something like, "You should lose a lot of weight." FML
Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML
Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML
Today, I taught my girlfriend some French. She then used her newfound language to break up with me. FML
Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML
Today, I was spooning with my girlfriend. She fell asleep and spent the next 15 minutes farting on me. FML
Today, I began taking a French language class. After completing and submitting some homework, I got a response. A response that was completely in French. I can't understand shit. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me what turns her on: cheese. FML
Today, I had to go with my mom to the gynecologist to translate due to her broken English. As we were filling out papers and answering questions, the doctor asked some very personal questions. I now know everything about my mom's sex life. FML
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Top comments
Eladar 0
when she asked what buttsex was... you should have been like "i'll show you"
nuclear 0
whoa, whoa, whoa. you read ALL 15 pages of this site while you were hanging out with your girlfriend? Instead of doing something else.. more productive? FYL! Nah, more like FHL. That must have been boring since she couldn't really understand :P
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Comments (81)
luver123 0
dye your hair black and you'll so look like adam sandler
prospekt1 0
french girls are ******* HOT
DiTHL 0
why is this an fml?
thongar 0
Buttsex is an anagram of subtext :D
Cynic_at_best 0
Oh. My. GOD. That's so embarrassing, I feel for you. :/
wren415 0
And you're the one who can't spell "one." =) Proofread before you decide to judge others' proofreading.
xxKatieegurlxx 0
haha this made me laugh so much
Ub3r_Crippl3 0
YDI for dating a French girl? No, YDI for dating a girl. YDI FOR EXISTING blahhghgahjgd!!!(!? How's that for trolling? Do I pass the test oh elder trolls?
MakeAScene 4
Just stop..
Music_Peace_1234 0
Umm... what IS Wanking? Someone care to explain? LOL XD By the way, how do you 'favourite' FMLs? Yeah, I am pretty new at this... None of my FMLs will show up!! I dont understand!!! :Z It aggrovates me, LOL. :P anyways, someone plzzzz explain to me what the frig wanking is?! Lol, thx!! :) Yours truely, Music_Peace_1234
loludeserveit 0
wanking is what I do when I think about hayley williams, or masturbation, in laymans terms.
pulpfiction_fml 3
Music_Peace_1234, wanking is another word for masturbating (only used when speaking of stroking the penis. Females can not wank) To add FMLs to your favourites, click the little grey + icon at the bottom of the anecdote. Something will pop up that says "Add to Facebook" or "Add to Favourites".
change0of0heart 0
oh my god that is the cutest thing ever x3