Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it was a warm day out so I left my car windows slightly open while I was at work. One of the local bums apparently thought this was a perfect opportunity to use my open driver's side window as a barf receptacle. FML
Today, I went to the mall with a couple of friends. While walking through the parking lot, we saw a very dirty car. You couldn't even see the inside of the car through the windows. I thought it would be funny to trace on the window, "Wash Me." After doing so, the driver got out of the car. FML
Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML
Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML
Today, I was driving home from work with the window down. I felt what I thought was rain coming through the window, until I looked over and realized it was urine mist coming from the cattle truck next to me. FML
Today, from the balcony of my apartment, I watched helplessly as a teen came along and peed through my car's open window. FML
Today, a homeless man started to wet himself in the recliner at the coffee shop where I work. He then walked all the way to the bathroom, only to finish urinating in a puddle right in front of the bathroom door. Guess who cleaned it up. FML
Today, I politely asked a man to not sleep on a tram stop that I had to clean. He got up, and while I leaned forward to pick up some trash from the ground nearby, I felt a warm stream on my back. Now I can't get the smell of urine off my clothes. FML
Today, while I was reluctantly driving to work on a Sunday, some guy in a shiny Audi threw a plastic root beer bottle full of urine at my old Toyota. He didn’t even bother to put on the cap on, like a gentleman would. FML
Today, I was at work, a grocery store, and my manager came up to me while I was on my lunch break. He told me that a customer said someone in the parking lot had been loitering around the cars. I went outside to investigate and saw a drunk man pooping on the front of a car. That car was mine. FML
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Top comments
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
Urine trouble now OP
Cairo_Sanchez 8
That's nasty as hell! Sorry OP
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Comments (93)
dragynfyre 4
I live in the LA metro area, my Windows go up as soon as anyone with a spray bottle appears. You're lucky if it was only urine in there....
MaryPoppins88 14
Well obviously he can't afford cleaner
TrailblazerSS 5
And the ancient Romans are now dead.
fallenangel72 7
That's sweet
joe502 3
I love to laugh at the misery of others and that shit is funny...
pickles1994 18
51- I'm pretty sure 42 was mocking 39 because he spelled it as "watch" too.
Meesersuperman1 4
Tip for the rest of your life: Whenever you see a homeless man while in your car, roll up the windows and lock the doors.
ohSNAPyall 27
Come on, Noor. We all know the real reason. He was marking your car as his territory. BAM, no more homelessness.
AlexBblah 10
Agree with #85 he probably is just going around marking territory's for all we know
neeni88 23
82, I'm pretty sure 51 was just joining in on the mocking.