Today, while pensively thinking up my next awesome Facebook status over dinner, I finally came to the conclusion that I need to get a life. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent an hour deleting 70 of my status posts from the past week so I don't look so addicted to Facebook. Damn, I need a life. FML
Today, I decided not to go on Facebook so people would actually think that I have a life. FML
Today, I decided I need to get a life. I reached this epiphany when I failed to take notice of my friend calling me, until he started calling out my Xbox gamertag. FML
Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML
Today, I realized I've been sinking into a deep depression, ignoring all my friends, and don't know what to do with my life anymore. This is all because I gave up Facebook for lent. FML
Today, I realized my self confidence is based on the amount of "likes" I have on my Facebook statuses. FML
Today, at 2 am on a Saturday, I purposely updated my Facebook status from my iPod so people will see that I posted from a 'mobile device' and think I'm out at a bar having a life, instead of sitting at home on my bed watching movies on my Netflix. FML
Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
Today, I took a deep breath and started journaling to "figure out my life." Two hours later, I had written four pages of ranting about my upstairs neighbor's loud footsteps and zero pages about my life goals. FML
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Top comments
Doortje 30
Your NEXT awesome facebook status? Yeah, somehow I doubt that you ever actually had anything close to an awesome status. So, what did you make of it? "Chicken and peas for dinner today!!! lol,jk jk, it was actually chicken and carrots!!11!"
Jimminee 3
sometimes it just comes to you.
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Comments (89)
newfiegirl 8
who really cares! sick crowd
lolitaababy 0
ah, thank you Mark Zuckerberg. try talking to your family or worrying about something that matters
track69 3
that guy is a genius!
lolitaababy 0
heck yes, he is brilliant!
iiNanix3 0
Then get one.
silverstream20 20
I'm getting a little tired of how people always condemn Facebook it's the people's own choice if they misuse it not the site although in this case I have to agree OP get a life
NextBigThing5044 0
You really do.
abasio 1
Yes, you do!
MrFlintstone 5
well op you apparently have a life since you can f*** it ^above comment is a jk^
1958x 6
Am I the only only who doesn't understand the facebook obsession?
happyFace12 0
get one, you will understand
1958x 6
No thank you. I think it's quite pointless.
kennyl25 3
no you are not alone trust me.. fb is just consuming peoples lives
honeybunches88 5
I have one but don't get on it anymore. There really isn't much to be obsessed with. It actually is quite pointless. Most people just post annoying statuses that no one really cares about.
kennyl25 3
i completely agree with you.. people must be really bored these days.. all they do is go on fb and update their status to eating at school i hate school.. watching tv etc... there really is no point to fb.. if you want to talk to someone pick up a phone and call them
milkndstufff 7
thats not true..only the losers with no life have to change their status every five seconds of their life to something retarded like that....otherwise theres nothing wrong with facebook...
ithappens28 0
op we're on the same boat..
Withired_Away 0
Newfoundland is not boring at all, if you have a life.
oxAshleAxo 8
Random post in the middle of nowhere?