Today, while pensively thinking up my next awesome Facebook status over dinner, I finally came to the conclusion that I need to get a life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I spent an hour deleting 70 of my status posts from the past week so I don't look so addicted to Facebook. Damn, I need a life. FML
Today, I decided not to go on Facebook so people would actually think that I have a life. FML
Today, I decided I need to get a life. I reached this epiphany when I failed to take notice of my friend calling me, until he started calling out my Xbox gamertag. FML
Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML
Today, I realized I've been sinking into a deep depression, ignoring all my friends, and don't know what to do with my life anymore. This is all because I gave up Facebook for lent. FML
Today, I realized my self confidence is based on the amount of "likes" I have on my Facebook statuses. FML
Today, at 2 am on a Saturday, I purposely updated my Facebook status from my iPod so people will see that I posted from a 'mobile device' and think I'm out at a bar having a life, instead of sitting at home on my bed watching movies on my Netflix. FML
Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
Today, I took a deep breath and started journaling to "figure out my life." Two hours later, I had written four pages of ranting about my upstairs neighbor's loud footsteps and zero pages about my life goals. FML
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Top comments
Doortje 30
Your NEXT awesome facebook status? Yeah, somehow I doubt that you ever actually had anything close to an awesome status. So, what did you make of it? "Chicken and peas for dinner today!!! lol,jk jk, it was actually chicken and carrots!!11!"
Jimminee 3
sometimes it just comes to you.
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Comments (89)
jess6blondie9 3
Facebook melts peoples brains.
moioi_fml 0
I see, you've already fallen victim...
cavalos94 0
^ win dude
jess6blondie9 3
Haha, how?
Lalala1996 0
Look at your picture.
jess6blondie9 3
I don't see anything wrong with it.
Zebidee 9
So instead you decided to drag the boring detritus of your life over to this website and bother us with it?
Sinkhole 26
Of course, now OP can use the "Share on Facebook" button on the FML and publish that. It will probably be more interesting than the rest of things OP has published.
randomgf 0
Your life really sucks if all you can think about is Facebook! You also deserve it for thinking somebody cares.
jewels1877 0
At least you were thinking of a cool status instead of being annoying and putting, "Eating supper then going to take a shower and then watching tv. " ??
GoPro2Oh 0
I think you might be right.
ipwnlosers 4
*you never fail to make me laugh!
happyFace12 0
shut up bitch what's your problem don't be like that
DocBastard 40
OP's next Facebook status: "omg my story was published on FML n ppl made fun of meeee!! :((((((((("
NbrL13 2
LOL! yeah OP you shod consider that as your next update status on facebook!
happyFace12 0
some ppl don't have lives. apparently you guys don't if you have nothing better to do than read how much ppls lives suck. and then tell them.
insanesna1l 0
hypocrite
happyFace12 0
what?
ElloGuvner 0
you always fail to make me laugh.
CreepyCrawl 0
Yes, you do (need a life).