Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was, "I farted." Well, at least they all laughed. FML
Today, I had a really big debate in my English Class about the legalization of weed. My group had to state reasons why weed shouldn't be legal and no one except me had prepared. My partner came to class totally stoned. Our group lost the debate. We got an F. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, whenever I get into arguments, I end up mixing up words. I was trying to prove a point by saying a type of chips, and was debating between Dorito chips or BBQ chips. I ended up saying "burrito chips." I said my friend would "sell me out for a bag of burrito chips." FML
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, I found another comment online referencing, "Smoke weed everyday." With all due respect for smoking weed, when will people learn that "every" and "day" need to be two separate words in that context? This is seriously making it hard for me to focus on my work. FML
Today, I was high on Marijuana and scrolling through Facebook when I couldn't figure out why I was seeing so much FML Posts no matter how far I scrolled and I was getting annoyed. Then I realized I was specifically on the FML Facebook Page and forgot because I was so high. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
CryMoreFMLs 15
It happens to the... um... what was I saying... Damn, I forgot.
bonezisme 0
nice sounds like short term hit you bad
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (728)
dugweacr 2
hey everybody assume she smokes week even tho we arent sure because were all idiots
benderbot19 0
riiiiight.....
bieberliscious2 0
woe thats bad for you so dont do it!!!
marijuanasmoker4 3
Whoa* And unless your a licensed medical professional your comment is worthless.
urdirtyolduncle 15
Same gies for you, 140
fratzjr 0
everyone that smokes weed is a ******* idiot to begin with, I have no sympathy for anyone that does something stupid while high or drunk. you could go jump off a building while your high for all I care. it's what you get for being a pot head.
brianjman14 23
Wow, not only are you judgemental, but also an asshole. If you don't like it, fine, but keep your rude comments to yourself. What the **** is your problem? ********.
Krilleee 5
I couldn't agree more 123!
docscientist 10
Not only are you ignorant, but you're an asshole as well.
budd28 0
well I can't b mad at ur comment .. many people feel this way... but I don't think u or any 1 should say people who smoke weed is stupid bcuz if I'm soo stupid I don't think I would have the 8th highest GPA in my school and b in all AP classes.. and I smoke weed almost every day so I must truly b an idiot :) weed is nothing to brag about but it's also not anything to feel bad about .. so yea
steveakafranxy 7
#715 There's a difference between knowledge and common sense, the latter of which is why people call you stupid.
SpectSelf 0
smoking weed doesn't make you dumb, it makes you lazy. maybe you just didn't want to finish the sentence
brianjman14 23
I partly agree with you there. I have heard that it makes you lazy but it really hasn't changed me that much. I mean, I was lazy, which is normal when you get into high school, but weed hasn't really changed me that much. It may just be certain people that it makes lazy but it hasn't made me any more lazy than I was before I smoked.
SpectSelf 0
yeah I see what your saying. I quit smoking over a year ago and to be honest nothing has really changed except I can pass a drug test and get a better job.
nemetonoberon 0
total dumbass!
5upernova 3
I am surprised that you even remember the conversation between you and your friend.
bieberliscious2 0
#129 retarded is the definition of some one who is really stupid or mental in any way just like the guy who posted this fml
joelmota 0
typical retard
Monkeybutt1 0
Acually weed is not as bad as people make it out to be. A lot of kids at my school smoke it and have strait a's. It also enhances creativity and can help fight off side effects of cancer. Nobody in history has ever died of smOking weed and you cannot overdose on it.
HahaYDI 0
I don't smoke weed, but if you look it up on the Interwebs there are many credible sources that state that it does not kill braincells. However it does **** up your lungs if you do it too much.