Today, while having sex I realized two things. First, I can't remember the last time my boyfriend gave me an orgasm, and secondly I think the curtains slightly clash with the duvet cover. I was more annoyed with the second one. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I fell asleep twice during sex. FML
Today, while having hot sex with my boyfriend, I was experiencing my very first orgasm. Right when my mother walked in. We had no blankets. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend masturbate next to me and then relieves himself on my bed sheets. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, I decided to dress up sexy for my boyfriend. I put on cute undies and a corset because they made the most of my assets. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "The colours don't match." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. My boyfriend noticed that every time I'm about to climax, I hit my head on something. Whether it's a wall or his face. FML
Today, my boyfriend has so many hang ups about being good at sex that when we actually had sex for the first time this morning, he got upset that I was touching my clit while he was inside me. Apparently it was a sign I think he’s bad at it, and had to do it myself. Neither of us orgasmed today. FML
Today, I fell asleep while my boyfriend and I were having sex. What's worse is that he didn't even notice. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him, because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Twinklestar 0
They're your priorities, so why is this an FML? Perhaps the reason you're not enjoying sex is because you're lying there paying attention to the curtains?
brrrx 0
Sounds like you should start having sex in the dark...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (123)
ananamoose 0
well at least there is less pressure on your boyfriend, if you care more about blinds right in the middle it means you don't care about cumming, so it's kind of your fault for not helping him out and not caring enough.
ghapsees 0
yeah, I don't get how she says that she cares less about the ******. Like, why is this an FML if the important thing doesn't bother her??
lmmmr 0
Because she knows that it should.
sumdoode123 0
YDI for not telling him what you want and just sitting there.
anuskina 0
that happens to me too often I have to say. i know every dot the ceiling has. I dont complain though, i wasnt meant to have orgasms but it gets ridiculous sometimes.
f_u_u_f_f 0
wasn't meant to have orgasms? wtf?
ryoga 0
Communicate, communicate, communicate.
MoobyTheCow 2
YLIA. NEXT!
lolinternet 0
YDI for whining about how bad he is at getting you off to random people on the Internet instead of him. What the **** are we supposed to do? We're not the ones ******* you. And he's not a psychic either, so it's not like he's going to figure out what you enjoy and don't enjoy all on his ******* own.
Theo_fml 0
You do realize that sex requires effort on both sides, right, you egocentrical, close-minded, and idiotic person? If your boyfriend can't give an ****** to you, it may be because of your own lack of focus and effort. So stop trying to force men to do all the work, and do your part too. That's the way to enjoy sex.
invisiblerabbit 0
i'll place my seed on your face. o, i am not a plant btw.
DameGreyWulf 1
I like how you say "place" instead of something like "squirt." It sounds so... benign, like you're going to grab up your seed and just put it on her. Also, I like 19 and 20's comments.
fwongraven 10
Hate shit FMLs. You sound self-absorbed and a bitch. Go buy a vibrator and save your boyfriend the hassle of being with you.
smilertylerfudge 0
this isnt an fml you dumbfuck
Pastor_Rich 0
okay monk, try masturbation