Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Dang y'all
Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML
You can talk, mate
Today, a customer asked me if I was English, because I was struggling to understand what he was saying. I said yes. He then called me a liar, and said I must be "one of them Polish immigrants." Oh, and he also had a thick Scottish accent. FML
Knowledge
Today, my mom hit me in the face after an argument she didn't win. According to her, Mexican and American are languages, and not dialects or nationalities. She even argued with my teachers, and threatened to remove me "from a school full of uneducated people" after they told her I was correct. FML
America, **** yeah
Today, a lady at the clothing store told me to, “Stop speaking 'Mexicano', this is America!” when I was talking on the phone. I actually speak Portuguese. When I pointed this out, she verbally tortured me and threatened to, “Call the cops” if I didn’t leave her store for, “making her feel threatened.” FML
Today, two drop dead gorgeous Australians asked me for directions. Being so shocked by their beauty and accents, I couldn't get words out of my mouth. Then one said to the other, "Nope, she doesn't speak English", then walked away. FML
Today, I was at the airport trying to help a man get to the right terminal. When he finished he turned to tell me "Don't worry, your English is pretty good, considering you're not American". English is my only language. FML
No comprendo
Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML
Proper banter
Today, I was on a chat site and a couple of cute guys asked for my "ASL". I had no idea what that meant so I asked one of my cousins. He said it meant "asshole" and that they were calling me an asshole. So I cursed at everyone who was actually asking for my "age, sex and location." FML
Duolingo
Today, a client came in and was struggling to speak properly. He said, “Sorry, no good English” so I offered a Spanish speaking colleague who could assist. He frowned and said he was from Greece. He threw a fit and got my manager involved. I got a write up and have to do an online sensitivity training. FML
What word was it?
Today, a tourist from an English-as-second-language country taught me a new word. In English. FML
Top comments
jsprackman 11
Im American and we can be pretty ignorant sometimes...
kareltje 17
Like Americans know their own language :D :D If anything ever was an oxymoron...
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Comments (55)
ErinBeam 1
Thats america for ya!
Wolvy_fml 3
It's cuz y'all speak funnai. Speek proper erngrish lai k us pleez
fo_86 0
Americans can be rude...just ignore the jerk ones...eventually they'll go away.
uprising_fml 0
it happens . some people really are ignorant that way because many people have problems with immigrants . I'm American and I really don't care, this is a free country, speak whatever you want . don't let a couple of horrible people ruin America and the US for good OP ! there are still good people out there .
ScarletBloom 14
It reminded me of a Russell Peters joke. Log on to YouTube and type "Russell Peters England". He was facing quite a similar situation as yours.
laurbear12 3
They were probably just jealous of your sweet accent ;)
hateevryone 15
omg. it's things like this that makes me embarrassed to call myself an american.
skin420 0
Americans are so arrogant and stupid they'd kick each others ass for talking "wrong". Most Americans can't even say roof properly!! Haha LOSERS! Why don't you go invade another country for oil...sorry W.M.D.
Wolverine48Ga 21
There's English, and the there is AMERICAN/FREEDOM. You should probably be fluent in it before you come to America.
Courtney Christoff-Tzazaroff 9
I’m sorry people are so ignorant 😐