Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband and I went on vacation. We got lost and had to ask the locals for directions to our hotel. Neither of us could understand their accents, and we ended up wandering around blindly for hours until we made it back on our own. FML
Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
Today, while on a vacation, I tried to step out of myself and flirt with this boy who I thought was cute. He was going along with it and nodding so I thought it was working. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he didn't speak English. FML
Today, I was unable to communicate with a customer who only spoke French. As a result, my boss called me a "monolingual idiot." I speak Spanish, German, and Japanese. FML
Today, while visiting family, we went to a restaurant to eat. Towards the end of the meal, I went to use the restroom. When I came back, everyone was gone. Everyone had actually gotten into their cars and left without me. I have no idea where I am and no one is answering their phone. FML
Today, I was on vacation, when a very cute guy starting talking to me and asked me what my name was. Overwhelmed and stressed out, I blurted out that I didn't have one. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Today, I was trying to get to my boyfriend via public transport in Thailand. He was giving the driver instructions through my phone when my phone went flat. I am now alone in the passenger seat of a car, next to a creepy old driver, no idea where he is taking me, and I don't speak a word of Thai. FML
Today, out of desperation, I had to fight my social anxiety in order ask a stranger for directions in a new city. She gave me a detailed answer, and I thanked her, then walked the wrong way for 15 minutes because I was too embarrassed to admit I’d understood none of it past the first sentence. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
The good news is I speak your language! How do you travel to a foreign country without learning the most basic phrases in their language? You should know: Hello/Goodbye Please/Thank you Would you kindly fondle my testicles? Just the basics. The bad news is I don't really want to talk to you either.
D J's MOM 17
this is when you stop being cheap and just buy a translation app
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
The good news is I speak your language! How do you travel to a foreign country without learning the most basic phrases in their language? You should know: Hello/Goodbye Please/Thank you Would you kindly fondle my testicles? Just the basics. The bad news is I don't really want to talk to you either.
tiptoppc 21
I’m guessing your hovercraft is full of eels.
D J's MOM 17
this is when you stop being cheap and just buy a translation app