Today, during harvest, I got out of my tractor and promptly fell down the stairs, peed my pants, and stepped ankle deep in a mud hole. I sat in wet pants for the next two hours. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to go down the stairs two steps at a time. I slipped, fell flat on my ass, and busted my lower lip against my overbite. When I tried to get up, I realized I had also peed my pants. FML
Today, I had a horrible headache on my way home from lunch. I pulled over and vomited so forcefully I peed my pants, a lot. I had pee in my shoes. FML
Today, working at a daycare centre, when packing up the kids' beds after sleep time, I slipped and landed in a puddle. Of urine. I had no spare pants. I had to wear them for the rest of my shift. FML
Today, I was leaving work after a storm. They're building some new offices outside, so I had to walk on an uneven path near the construction zone. I came to a big puddle and tried to jump across to what I thought was a piece of asphalt. It was mud. I slipped and fell backwards into the puddle. FML
Today, I slipped and fell in mud while running from the car to inside to avoid getting wet in a torrential downpour. I was running from the limo, in my wedding dress, to the church for my wedding. FML
Today, my friend peed her pants while we were sledding. I could feel it trickling down into my pants. FML
Today, I tried to take a piss in the woods, but ended up peeing all over my feet. I still had to hike another five hours in wet shoes. My boyfriend's only comment was, "At least you didn't wet your pants." FML
Today, I was driving slightly off road for work to clean a well. I didn't want to get my boots muddy by walking the last 20 ft through mud, so I tried to drive through. I spent the next four hours on hands and knees digging my way out. FML
Today, I was suffering from some gastric distress. While on my way to a job interview, I slipped on some concrete that was wet due to a recent slight rain shower. I didn't fall. I DID shit my pants though. I walked back home slowly in shame to clean up the mess. I didn't make it to the interview. FML
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
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Top comments
tonyfan00 38
So technically you soiled yourself?
Tripartita 45
Are you experiencing any of the following, OP: flickery motion, overly-bright areas, black and white color palette, and a noticeable lack of any sound. If you have one or more of any symptom listed, ask your doctor to check for old-timey-slapstick-comedy syndrome.
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Comments (12)
Ultimate_Batman 28
Wow FML has changed a lot since 2016
Glowworm56 27
Wait a minute--tractors have stairs?
Nova Solarius 10
Some, not all, have ladders on the side.
tonyfan00 38
So technically you soiled yourself?
Ashley Beecher 8
twice
Tripartita 45
Are you experiencing any of the following, OP: flickery motion, overly-bright areas, black and white color palette, and a noticeable lack of any sound. If you have one or more of any symptom listed, ask your doctor to check for old-timey-slapstick-comedy syndrome.
davecross 11
Sound like the perfect storm
Kwlkat 10
I believe your pants were no longer wet after 30 minutes or were you peeing on yourself for the whole 2 hours.
Jenni0816 5
Since you aren't a female you wouldn't understand the dynamics involved in clothing being able to air dry between closed legs. You also wouldn't understand the difference in where the wetness would be since men and women are built differently(men pee through external appendages and women have semi internal appendages). Not to mention, knowing that you are sitting in pants that are damp from urine would be uncomfortable for anyone.
gobiteme2 34
You had a simple solution Remove your pants and hang them out to dry. When dry you could hit the pants against the tractor to knock off the now dried pants.
donb23 23
Good thing that mud wasn't something the cow left behind!