Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to go down on me with chewing gum in her mouth. I spent the next hour and a half getting Orbit out of my pubes. FML
Today, my boyfriend requested that I shave my lips so I spent an hour in the shower carefully removing every trace of pubic hair. Turns out he wanted me to shave my moustache, not my carpet. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML
Today, after sex, my boyfriend turned to me and said, “I need to check something down there.” I asked what but he just smiled and showed me the piece of gum he was chewing. He took a look and left to get the scissors. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to pull down my panties with his teeth but it proved more difficult than he thought, so he got a real good mouthful and gave it a really hard pull. They did come down, but he also pulled out what felt like half my pubes. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I kindly asked my boyfriend to shave his pubic hair to make oral sex more enjoyable for me. He declined, saying, "Think of it as flossing your teeth. I'm doing you a much needed favor." FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML
Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DropTheDaggerxx 31
Hey, does everyone forget pubic hair is perfectly natural? If you think it's "gross", you're probably not old enough to touch a ******. Everyone has personal preferences but it's amazing how many people seem to think that it's some unspoken rule for chicks to shave EVERYWHERE.
humorizer 14
My dog would beg to differ.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (199)
itschrisssybro 8
Gum, really? Wow. What an idiot he is...
kalebthompson 0
Well just shave then I mean come on no guy likes carpet
redtigerlily 5
Why are you telling her to shave? You don't know how much hair she has, it could just be a little bit of hair that he is being bitchy over.
kristen69 0
Personally I don't like body hair anywhere on me or my fiancee he said no when I asked him to shave but he would keep it tamed. I shave and he could careless either way because we love each other. If u want to shave then do it. If not then he will have to deal with it or leave. Don't change for anyone. :)
skyeblue82 5
douchebag...dump him
allie2015 3
Like what the others said. Just shave it. But then don't let him have it for a while . He deserves it.
xblitzx34 0
Damn girl trim it at least
unluckygrk12 8
yo idgas wut any1 says, an unshaven pussy is ******* gross. natural ya, but licking hair is disgusting. take the time out nd not make the poor man suffer. please. and all u girls who say it's natural and wtvr, u proli get none.
widgywoo 8
what? ^
notthechosen 6
I just have to say if you are in fact licking hair you are doing it all wrong. Even with the bushiest natural ******; if you are eating pussy properly you should never lick hair. The area you should be licking is naturally hair free. The hair is like a curtain you don't need to remove it to see out the window, you just need to push it aside. I personally wax monthly but my bf would prefer if I left it, but I don't like to so off it goes..... OP you have to do what feels right for you and if you bf doesn't like it replace him they are a dime a dozen....
AmazingLadyy13 0
I've probably gotten more ass than you. Don't talk like that in public, it makes you look stupid.
unluckygrk12 8
first of all, if u get in the area, u tongue still touches hair. second of all thts gross. ya. and btw I'm in college with a 3.75 hs gpa. I'm sorry that I dnt use perfect grammar on FML. FML isn't school.
skyeyez9 25
If you never want to receive oral, then dont shave.
tattoofano 0
the French.. you expected anything else?