Today, I spent 30 minutes listening to my crush complain about a stalker that's been sending her flowers and love poems almost every week. It's me. FML

Today, my creepy, stalker ex-girlfriend was given an anonymous love letter. She's convinced it's from me. FML

Never forget

Today, I received the only love letter I've ever gotten. Too bad it's from the guy who's been stalking me. FML

Today, after many, many attempts to get her out of my life, the girl that is stalking me told me that she loves me and our love can only be ended by her killing either herself or me. FML

Today, I wrote my girlfriend a song. She wrote me a 13-page letter on why we should break up. FML

Smothered

Today, I wrote "I love you" on my girlfriend's Facebook wall. She completely freaked out and accused me of being "too clingy" and that I'm starting to feel more like a stalker than a boyfriend. FML

Today, I sent my girlfriend a long-overdue message telling her I feel like she doesn't really care about me any more, that it seems like she only ever calls me when she needs money, and that I'm even starting to suspect she may be cheating on me. 14 hours later, she replied: "TL;DR". FML

Today, the girl that I have been secretly madly in love with for 6 years told me "fuck off and stop doing nice things for me." FML

Is she Julia Stiles?

Today, I asked a girl out. She sent me a whole list of reasons that she hated me. FML

Today, I confessed my love to my crush over text. Later, she posted the message I'd sent her on Facebook and wrote "look at the pathetic man". The post had over 50 laugh reacts. FML