Today, things were getting heated with my boyfriend and I told him that I was finally ready to lose my virginity. Clearly he couldn't wait to get started because he fell asleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having really great sex with my boyfriend. I was on top and he seemed like he was really enjoying it. Then, I realized he'd fallen asleep. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. Soon, I noticed he was being very quiet. When I looked up, he was in a deep sleep. FML
Today, I fell asleep while my boyfriend and I were having sex. What's worse is that he didn't even notice. FML
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML
Today, I finally decided to sleep with my boyfriend. It was my first time and I was really nervous so when he was being all romantic with candles and wine I went a bit overboard and drank too much. I passed out. I woke up a few hours later, still a virgin, and in a puddle of my own piss. FML
Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while still giving me oral sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML
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Top comments
Morgannnnuhhh 1
Girlfriend: "babe, I love you and I'm ready to lose my virginity to you." Boyfriend: "aright let me take a nap first?" Op, that would reallllly boost my confidence. Maybe that is a sign he isn't the one to lose it to. Take the hint.
JenDanielle917 13
Wake him up and start again. (:
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Comments (128)
IndianGiver 8
Hes restin up for the big moment.
eddyg94 11
I can imagine the scene.. "Ok, I'm ready for you to take my virginity. Now here's my 42 point plan of action so that it all goes well. We will start at 2000 hours...." *snoooore*
Kog_Hiro 17
No such thing as 2000 hours. You mean 0200 hours?
TheOrangeProon 13
2000 hours is 8 o'clock...
KiddNYC1O 22
8 pm*. All my clocks are set to military time. 19 fails badly. Military time is the shit.
desireev 18
That is the only guy that I've heard of that would choose sleep over sex! Maybe he is a good catch! Obviously, sex isn't his #1 priority! :)
shireeniee 8
Taking care not to hurt his girlfriend's feelings isn't one of his priorities either.
desireev 18
I was being sarcastic.. Sometimes, I feel like I need to insert the "*sarcasm*" into my comments.. But there is a sense of truth in my comment.. Eh.. Oh well...
coldashell 23
People these days are too dumb to understand sarcasm. I suppose sarcasm is a dish best served to those with some degree of intelligence.
NikkiFlysKites 8
How does someone tell if something over the Internet is sarcasm or not? There's nothing in her comment that screams, "Sarcasm". It appeared to me as 100% sincere.
boopityboppity 11
I believe - although this is by memory, so I can't be certain - that this is the internet rule #144 in action.
luccmon 6
Hey, woah, if falling asleep meant that a man didn't care about your feelings then most women would have switched teams by now.
wlddog 14
As a man that works over 12 hours a day, on a regular bases, I am hopin he is of the same cloth as I. Sometimes we just don't have the energy. It's got nothing to do with desire, it's just the physical ability at the moment. If she just let him nap then come wake him later, I am sure he would have perked right up and accomplished the task at hand.
JayC42 6
How bout a double forward slash? Wow, that was hilarious!! //
fuzzbuck1 4
You can still do him;)
nofearjenshere 12
That's one way to wake him up! Haha.
jizzwold 21
It's also rape.
nofearjenshere 12
"So how did you lose your virginity?" "Ohh, the usual, I lost it raping my boyfriend in his sleep..."
hamtaro331 0
That just sucks
Sumo69 9
How cute you will remember your first time forever I think this story makes it special
DjeePee 25
No no, she will remember the time before her first time (hopefully) forever.
Ellenpop 15
You snooze, you lose.
FmyLifeInsurance 1
Not in this case
luccmon 6
I see what you did there...
Kog_Hiro 17
OP, Maybe your just not doing it right
Belthazor_fml 5
Oh ******* WOW!!! That makes ZERO sense!!!
AmongstTheFaces 5
You seem mind ******....
BostonBruinsFan 8
I second that!!
thatnucca 36
Sit on his face and let him smell that monkey... That always does the trick for me...