Today, my dog wanted to go upstairs, but she has stitches and was having trouble. So I carried her to the top, at which point she peed all over my carpet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dog had an upset stomach and diarrhea. To avoid a mess on the carpet, I confined her to a gated area in the kitchen with sheets over the floor, so any mess could be cleaned up easily. Instead of going on the sheets, she sprayed shit all up the walls. FML
Today, my dog had diarrhea in his cage. While I was carrying his dirty bed downstairs to the washer, he ran by and tripped me. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
Today, I went to let my puppy out, and I turned around to see her peeing on the carpet. After getting her outside, I saw my little sister pooping on the floor. FML
Today, I let my dog outside so he could pee. After an hour, I let him back in. He just wanted to come inside to pee on the floor. FML
Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML
Today, I drank cocktails and shots. On the way home, I had to pee so bad that I only got to the front door and peed all over our carpet. My mom saw the whole thing and my dad saw the aftermath with the super drenched carpet and shoes. My mom had to mop the floor after I ran to the bathroom. FML
Today, I had to carry the dead weight of my 90-pound husky upstairs to the bath because he hates it. He cried the entire time, loudly. He then rolled in the dirt when I let him outside to pee not even an hour later. FML
Today, my puppy celebrated a milestone by lifting his leg to pee for the first time. Too bad it was up against my brand new soft fabric couch. FML
Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML
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Top comments
IndianGiver 8
And back downstairs she goes
anelelabel 6
Aww poor dog. I would like to believe that she is normally well behaved and that the stitches are at fault.
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Comments (101)
jojoboy 0
That is when you walk over to her bed and pee on it and ask her how it feels
Dracoboxer357 36
^ Right, cause that wouldn't make two puddles of piss for OP to now clean up and I'm sure the dog Must have done it as part of it's cunning plan to anger it's caring owner. :p
Morgannnnuhhh 1
I remember you..
jtthegr8 26
Thats dumb...the dog wouldn't care, they never care!
Unlucky_Gun 0
Yeah the dog wouldn't care. And also, of course you ask the dog how it feels because a dog could totally answer that
thatonetroll 0
3 you dug yourself into this hole. See what I did there he's in a hole in the picture and no one agrees with his comment
sweetdreams20 0
Is that why your parents put you in a hole?
sportychick101 0
Soo true, plus dogs are not like humans we don't think the same way or show the same emotions. As us people do everyday :p
jojoboy 0
Haha I has to thumb this up! That was good
jojoboy 0
Yo I'm sorry some people didn't see the dripping sarcasm in this, but I wasn't offering help to OP.
reenkaur 7
uh oh! clean d carpet fast before it starts to stink!!!
enopola 5
No no by all means we were going to let it sit and soak in. We want guests to ask about the piss stains as ice breakers.
laynethetrain 0
oh you too?
MaximumRode 0
Ya don't say
reenkaur 7
you are kind person to have done tat :). clean up quick!!!
choshaki 8
You must be really bored. :P
darwinism 30
before it starts to stink, right?
_Oblivion_ 12
How many ******* comments are you gunna post?
zombicidal 11
you're not going to be popular here
CryMoreFMLs 15
Im starting to wonder if English is this person's second language...
AmongstTheFaces 5
Spamming is frowned upon unless your comments are actually good.
smartassking 0
BITCH PLEASE SHUT UP!!
jtthegr8 26
At least learn to spell /:
coldashell 23
Dont see how 58 was modded but you did not for spamming. Quality over quantity.
anelelabel 6
Aww poor dog. I would like to believe that she is normally well behaved and that the stitches are at fault.
QQmore_fml 18
Family guy Consuela voice : "No, noooh. doggie afuera!!!!!"
IndianGiver 8
And back downstairs she goes
thatgirlinoregon 21
After getting fixed, my puppy had trouble holding it... Maybe it's a temporary side effect of the surgery? That, or your dog is just spiteful.
AmongstTheFaces 5
Now you have a reason to give your dog more stitches
thisbitchlys 0
thats not even right..
Morgannnnuhhh 1
I agree with 79. 54, why would you even think that's funny you sick sick bastard.
reenkaur 7
uh oh! too bad! but that was very kind of you
ollie179 21
I got the point in your first comment...
marmlr339 14
Uh oh! Better write a suitable comment!
jtthegr8 26
Wait, how does this one even make sense....
patebishop 7
FYL
kut19 6
Yeah, I piss everywhere when I have stitches, too. :S
lovebeecharmer 6
She's probably in pain or not feeling good. Get OVER yourself, it's just pee.