Today, the weather was so hot that I couldn't stop sweating profusely while using the restroom. Ever slipped off the toilet seat and hit the floor hard due to ass-sweat? Not a pleasant experience. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Sweaty
Today, it was so hot in the un-airconditioned gym that when I got up off the floor, I slipped in my own pool of sweat and got a concussion. FML
Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML
Rememberance Day special
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Sprinkler system
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML
Fast and Furious
Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML
Bustin' my ass
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
Gush gashed
Today, I was using a public restroom when the automatic toilet flushed prematurely. The sudden gush of water startled me so much that I jumped up and slipped, hitting my head on the stall door. A concerned stranger had to help me up. FML
HELP!
Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML
Thanks, Mr Whiskers
Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML
Top comments
chocolateisyum 12
Well that must have been a slippery situation.
Pleonasm 36
Lovely image, thanks. I can't imagine your butt being any cleaner than today.
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Comments (106)
blackgirllb 12
yes I have
Whatapuffchild 23
hope you didnt hurt the toilet
Behronzo11 7
Was it while you were crowning?:/ that sucks OP
needleinmypants_fml 4
My old apartment would be at 100 when the weather outside was 70. I couldn't use the toilet without slipping. I feel your pain op.
mgrace88 8
O.0 Well to answer your question, no. Never happened. Why would you want to tell people about it anyway?? Good job on posting anonymous.
Kauphy 12
The point of this website is to share terribly tragic yet hilarious stories with the people of the Internet. Have a sense of humor.
davincidasecond 24
Why tell people about it? Uh, maybe because that's the point of fml?
brittyboo123 35
I guess you have to wipe before and after you use the toilet. And by wipe I mean your whole butt.
StacyRenae 9
And I thought I was the only one who sweats profusely.
arre2006 19
Too top heavy or something? How the hell do you manage that?
graceinsheepwear 34
Is that what they call a bum ride?
ceji3 13
Not pleasant at all.