Today, the weather was so hot that I couldn't stop sweating profusely while using the restroom. Ever slipped off the toilet seat and hit the floor hard due to ass-sweat? Not a pleasant experience. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was so hot in the un-airconditioned gym that when I got up off the floor, I slipped in my own pool of sweat and got a concussion. FML
Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML
Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
Today, I was using a public restroom when the automatic toilet flushed prematurely. The sudden gush of water startled me so much that I jumped up and slipped, hitting my head on the stall door. A concerned stranger had to help me up. FML
Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML
Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML
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Top comments
chocolateisyum 12
Well that must have been a slippery situation.
Pleonasm 36
Lovely image, thanks. I can't imagine your butt being any cleaner than today.
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Comments (106)
FlyingPie 17
Careful not to get butthurt.
awepicdude 7
Where state r u in???
perdix 31
#36, an embarrassed and slightly bruised one ;)
10showgirl 16
Probably Louisiana. It's hot and humid here.
mandacleary 14
or Texas. it was 107 today
CharresBarkrey 16
It says OP is in Nevada. Really, guys? PS - It's forecasted to be 118+ in Arizona the next few days. I win.
noelasis94 18
If only you had a little ball sweat with that ass juice.
upallnight11 19
This almost made me puke
jaguar45b 7
Or someone peed on the lid :/ I think I'd prefer butt sweat
AngrySailor 17
Damn you swanus! (pronounced sway-nis) This condition manifests itself by profuse sweating of the anus and surounding area. Commonly affects truck drivers and ships engine room crews during the summer months.
dmattimeoj 12
i believe the technical term would be 'swamp ass'.
redbandit9877 12
I'm from Arizona, and am fairly small,so I can honestly tell you, been there done that OP, you aren't alone.
morngo 8
If it helps that's happened to me before
The_Big_Boss 20
Ydi. Anyone with some sense would be able to tell "i'm about to slide off" and readjust themselves
RedPillSucks 33
Correction. Any sober non-texting person
Californialuvv 7
Mm Lovely!
JasonUMN 15
It's cheaper than going to a water park.