Miscellaneous: Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's...

Anonymous 30 April 2014, 21:51 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML

101 comments

Collection

Halloween

A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.

Same thing different taste

fuckered519 6 December 2014, 19:53 Du Quoin, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, being useless at thinking of gifts, I asked my boyfriend what he wants for Christmas. I said it could be anything that I could afford. He looked me in the eye and said very seriously: "Anal." FML

118 comments

Anonymous 21 September 2013, 18:10 United States

Thanks, I guess…

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

199 comments

Anonymous 14 May 2012, 00:25 Newark, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Fashionista

Today, it's my birthday. All I wanted was birthday sex, but all my boyfriend could talk about was how great the new purse he got me was. I think he might like it more than me. FML

175 comments

Alycat 8 July 2017, 14:29 🌶️ Spicy

Today, as it's my birthday, I was hoping for a nice present from my boyfriend. What did he get me? A PornHub account. FML

23 comments

same 21 November 2015, 06:39 Palo Alto, United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML

91 comments

ehwat 26 November 2009, 05:31 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that since I lost my job I can't afford a Christmas present for him, or anyone. He said trying anal would be fine. FML

146 comments

amber 19 April 2012, 18:00 Saint Paul, United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML

183 comments

salt. 28 February 2012, 22:04 United States

Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom." That's how he put it, anyway. FML

95 comments

Noname 23 February 2009, 01:32 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, for my birthday my boyfriend bought me a sexy outfit to wear for him. At the bottom of the bag was a razor. FML

96 comments

Anonymous 20 April 2023, 22:00 Taren Point, Australia

Grateful

Today, it's the day after my birthday. My boyfriend got me nothing. Nor did he do anything for me for Valentine's Day. Whereas I got him an $85 game for his birthday, planned a surprise visit to his family so he could see them and his pets, and spent all day Valentine's Day making the house spotless, as well as cakes. FML

5 comments

TaiReiSi 12

1 May 2014, 05:20

Wait, whose birthday does he think it is?

tygerarmy 35

1 May 2014, 05:25

So, what did he say when you told him to bend over?

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Comments (101)

whynotbliss 18

2 May 2014, 03:01

I disagree! You got the gift of wisdom! Well only if you were/are wise enough to dump his self centered ass and save yours (ironic) for someone better.