Today, my young daughter came up to me, grabbed my face and said, "I'm putting you in the garbage." When I laughed and asked why, she looked me dead in the eye and said, "You are trash." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, I asked my lazy daughter to go make her bed. She responded by lighting our garbage bin on fire. FML
Today, my daughter is still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML
Today, my daughter told me she never wants to see me again because I had an abortion. She wanted me to have the baby and then give it to her so she could raise it as hers. FML
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Today, I had to end a phone conversation with, "I gotta go, my daughter's eating toilet paper." FML
Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML
Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML
Today, I caught my young daughter eating candy after brushing her teeth. Angry, I asked her if she wanted all her teeth to fall out. She smiled and said, “Yes!” FML
Today, I had to give my four year-old daughter some tough love, which I hate doing. When she ran away crying, my son, her twin brother, looked at me and said, "You should be ashamed of yourself." FML
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Top comments
AverageJoey 18
"Well if i'm trash then what does that make you?" "I don't know!" "Grounded. It makes you grounded."
blakeyboy22 12
Well... Hopefully it isn't garbage day anytime soon, make the escape while you can!
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Comments (82)
Niedermayer_20 12
Give the child the Nobel.
badmandilon 19
If she said all those words, she is old enough to know what she's saying. It's a mistake of OP laughing about such a disrespectful act and comment. I think more and more parents are growing kids with no respect for anything nowadays.
bayy1432 14
kids may say the darnedest things but they say shit that hurts your feelings lol
travellingfun 18
Kids can be so cruel.
Sheepalicious 20
a certain kid needs to be smacked
chosha_fml 27
And that, Doctor, was our first clue that she might be a psychopath.
ToxicMoo33 18
Sounds like someone has spent too much time on tumblr.
PeaceFull 3
Have been grounded and lectured as a hold for my bad jokes. I was surprised and terrified by reaction of my parents and older siblings to simple jokes. So surprise that those events stuck with me and are very clear in my memory. Not nice. Kids are not aware of the crappy definitions you make.
thejonac 21
'remember how you're my daughter? if that's so, you're fbe daughter of trash, you understand?'
SydLovesLacey 18
Ouch.