Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, I knew micropenises existed, I just never expected I’d see one in person after spending weeks building my anticipation of losing my virginity, getting naked in front of him, then being presented with half a cocktail sausage. Even if we had sex I think I’d still be a virgin. FML
Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
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Top comments
runamile 4
Well no use complaining about it...Next time upgrade to king size if it bothers you so much.
amerwin 3
How have u not seen/felt/tasted his tiny until this point? Have y'all even kissed yet? Its interesting that you would just skip straight to bumping uglies without first coming across his miniature **** at least once.
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Comments (181)
jrgr 6
wow I'm so sorry! lol
tesuan 0
it's 6:17 on the fifth how in hell r u posting this 6 hours from now? OP is american so it's 6;17 for him
vatt 0
the site is based in France I think and there is a 6 hour tine difference
NacRat 0
The same thing happened with the guy I lost mine too except he also had to ask "Am I even in?". Now THAT was bad.
Ninjafriends 1
Are you saying not only did he have a mini tool, but you have a cavernous holster? What a terrible combination!
fmlwinnn 0
its not small, it's fun-sized! :D
alwa7sh 2
you can also call it travel-size
NacRat 0
No, I'm saying not only was it small, but he disn't know how to use it period.
Nadinek98 0
lolz teach him how to :}
mzeemzima 0
haha makes me feel proud I'm black lolz
allanaskye 0
74 wins!
KiddNYC1O 22
1- You should share your sorrows with the boyfriend. lol
mauk 0
must've been Justin beiber
boyguydudemalema 0
#15, i agree its is pretty sad, your so loose he cant tell if he's in or not. "it feels like it didn't went in anything"
Withired_Away 0
I'm thinking it was Justin bieber in bed with her
Lord_Osiris 0
In fact, the Aflac duck is Gilbert Gottfried who is kind of a bad ass. If you don't believe me check out the aristocrats joke he did in the middle of a packed banquet hall for an awards ceremony.
InnocentLies 0
FACT: The average penis size is 6 inches. :p I googled it. >_< :D
lola_popz 0
win. whats with these girls and their damn duck faces?! attention ladies duck faces are not cute.
irockfendergirl 0
128- Exactly. I'm curious too. When a girl makes a duck face, it makes them look ridiculous. Maybe I'm just old. ;)
angel55033 12
how would you know how either??? I thought you were virgins
irockfendergirl 0
132- I like your tattoo. It's pretty! How long did it take?
InnocentLies 0
Whats a duckface? ;)
ellemk 0
neither is flipping someone off.
sweeney18 0
*they're
malteseassassin 0
not all of ur kind is hung dumbass
omgshaylaaa 0
128. you look like a dumbass flipping off the camera so I wouldn't be talking or insulting other people's pics. agree with 143. 146. shut up. don't tell people what to do with their profile pics. she looks cute. you on the otherhand, look like a complete asshole with your completely lame and unoriginal jokes.
sylphy 0
170 She still looks like a duck. Just smile for the camera. Don't ***** for it or make fishy duck lips. It makes you look like your IQ has been halved and to post a picture of yourself in a pose that dumb, it would have to be.
stephyhull 4
132 your tattoo is amazing!
GreatGeak 8
Burn FML! Burn! you tell em 170!
FYLorYDIohno 12
Shame on the average size.
foreverspellman 0
120- also fact: in a scientific study, only 1 in 10 black guys have larger than average penises... and 2 in 5 white guys have above average size. so thanks for all the hype, black ppl. lol
breakofdawn1 0
lol that is really sad when a own guy calls his penis "fun size " he should probably just go kill him self now and would op see his dick before ever having sex with him or did the miss 3rd base completely ?
RedPillSucks 33
google is not a scientific study. Unless you have a reference, please stop. I can just see a bunch of scientists gathered in a group *Lets see if we can get funding to do a ANOVA study of penis length correlated with race* Who the hell would fund that? Also, I don't think black people started the hype.
TwoZeroOZ 2
There HAVE been those kind of studies, 225. But how do only 40% of white men, and 10% of black men have above average penis sizes? Where's the rest of the population lie? This must mean that asians are actually huge.
Sinkhole 26
I think that TwoZeroOZ didn't understand the supposed statistics. He's taking everything as one single statistic, when in fact, they're different statistics. In any case, if someone is going to mention statistics, they should mention according to which study. For example, I can say that according to a study conducted by Drs. Kevan Wylie and Ian Eardlie of the Porterback Clinic and Royal Hallamshire Hospital in Sheffield and St. James' Hospital in Leeds, respectively, found that the notion that penis size varies according to race, is false. This study was detailed in the British Journal of Urology, and of course that it's not absolute truth, 'cause the results vary across studies. There are plenty of websites showing these kind of statistics, you can't rely on those, most of them are not very accurate, to say the least.
hhhiii 0
ewwww your feet D:
jpest17 5
lol I'm not sorry, YDI! you didn't catch on, btw would u break up off of that???
iamthellamaking 0
just saying beiber doesn't have a dick
Graphix 0
you have a natural duck face. just sayin.
arhanes 0
and actually the average male penis is closer 4.9 inches not 6. this was according to the Kinsey institute of Indiana University which is known as one of the top sexual research institutes in the world
TheNeonDuckie 0
YOUR PIC IS BOTH AWESOME AND VERY GROSS!!
OvenproofToast 0
It's going to be hilarious if after she said she was a virgin she gets pregnant.
Dandukas 0
40% above avarage means that there is 40% above avarage it says nothing about avarage and under avarage ... your math is weird ...
therealdavid 0
Did the cherry pop?;)
caitibug323 0
Please tell me what a cherry is, because last I checked there is no fruit in any ******. If you are referring to the hymen, then you are still an idiot because you do not "pop" it. The hymen will wear away over time without sex so basing "virginity" off the hymen is ridiculous. If you still have some of your hymen when you do have sex, it may tear, but around puberty it's presence is barely noticeable. Just saying. OP - virginity is more a state of mind than anything physical. If you don't count it as sex, then don't.. but have some compassion for your boyfriend. He can't help how small his penis is so try to instead find out other things y'all can do sexually to have fun. Besides, statistics are against you having an ****** during sex. It just doesn't happen that often for women. So explore your sexuality with him. You may find that oral sex is way better! :)
caitibug323 0
its* My phone enjoys correcting what I say incorrectly. lol
urexwouldhateme 1
There hasn't been a methodologically sound study done on the topic but the one that came the closest found that average is average across races with a slightly smaller length in asian and indian (but only by about a negligible half inch.) That means for every poorly endowed white guy there is an equally poorly endowed black guy. Same with the above averages. And 225 is right, the myth of the giant black penis was started by white slave owners to insinuate that they were sexually predacious and fuel the fires of lynch mobs. Read a book, people.
ifinsane 6
Don't harsh your boyfriend like that.
runamile 4
Well no use complaining about it...Next time upgrade to king size if it bothers you so much.
TheDrifter 24
So you're saying that if he's not bigger than a Snickers then snickers he will hear?
silentvoice 0
I've been told chodes are the most pleasurable :P
Clare420 0
yep!
firecapez 4
Bahahahahahahaha 25 epicly wins ^^
ChronicSnowflake 0
I agree if it bugs you next time upgrade... atleast he told you before yo your bad for not investigating ahead of time
KSGmama08 0
OP, did you ask if he even hit puberty?!? lmao. That absolutely sucks for you! Better get some sex toys for yourself. and get him a pocket pussy to practice with. ;P
FreshlyCut 0
Wise words...
tctheamazing 7
Not at all.
Nadinek98 0
bahahahahahahhahahaha. fail. he warned u
jdogy 0
lmfaooooooooooooooooooooo true say :}
chaosdragn16 2
she shouldn't have been sleeping with her cousin.... eh Virginia, go figure.
master_blaster 0
I think it's more of an fml for the guy than her lol
VickyG17 4
are we talking about erecting fun size candy bar oooor?
swimmerstud 7
140 she said nothing about a cousin.
channyboo 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
lol , this is a good one . . . yeah youre a virgin . lmfaoo .
Doortje 30
Hahaha, that's one way to put it.
Lounia_fml 8
Duhh, after all you live in VIRGINia..
MrRawwr84 0
yeah we appreciate the enthusiasm but yeeaaaaa it just wasn't funny...
Bagel09 11
haha you're black, now that's funny!
starrs_movingIn 0
your pretty lame.
Imagirll 3
duuude. that was not funny. I live in west Virginia.
noshtsherlock 0
200... ^ then your g-spot is on the west side, duuuhhh
Zmeilerr 22
Two words: Male Enhancement.
Nadinek98 0
^this LOL
H3ALTHFR3AK 0
male enhancement pills won't help, he needs 8 major operations or a strap-on :( sorry op
FYLminerocks 7
He'll have to change the nickname around then. But why is it called fun-sized? Fun-sized should be huge not tiny. Who likes mini candy anyways? ;)
H3ALTHFR3AK 0
just a little bit of something can be fun, but a large one would be called completely-satisfying-sized
psycho15 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
sorry that proly worse sex ever! he did warn you tell him to hit puberty lol
MrRawwr84 0
What's your number ? ill sort you out girl... ;)
camie56 0
bruh u sick dat bitch mite be ugly
MrRawwr84 0
you made me feel dirty :( brb need to take a shower now!
amerwin 3
How have u not seen/felt/tasted his tiny until this point? Have y'all even kissed yet? Its interesting that you would just skip straight to bumping uglies without first coming across his miniature **** at least once.
beccusmaximus 0
Yeah, I would've though they'd at least gotten to hand jobs.
nynjapyrate 0
I agree with this!
10_4Franky 0
Bumping uglies! Haha.
ifktonymo 0
Yeah, he said bump uglies, big whup, want to fight about it? xD
xNephilim 19
When I lost my virginity to my now-fiancé, we'd never done anything but kissing. We didn't even get to ******** and handjobs until later. To me, all that was too... Advanced, I guess. It just all freaked me out, haha.