Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML
Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, my wife opted for a home birth with a nurse and her mother. Her mother is such a baby-feral, men-are-bastards, hippie feminist dragon that not only did she yell at me when I tried to be in the room, she has now pushed me out of the house. I ended up sat in my car with only one shoe and no phone. FML
Today, my wife's water broke so I drove her to the hospital. After 16 hours without labor, I went home to get a little sleep. Four hours later I got the call and ran outside to find that my car was towed from my parking space. FML
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
Today, my husband was offered, and accepted, pain relief during an ultrasound on his scrotum, and I’m sat here remembering how I wasn’t offered any pain relief at all while birthing a 9lb baby, because I was left in the waiting room so long they told me it was too late for an epidural. FML
Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML
Today, a customer at work was having hiccups, so I suggested she should try to hold her breath for a while. Ten minutes later, she's talking to my manager about how I wanted her to "kill herself because of her severe medical condition." FML
Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML
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Top comments
nerdyninjarobot 5
Holy shit that bitch needs to be fired. That is so out of line!
SolarLunix 21
Super unprofessional. Report her!
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Comments (233)
Shadowtrooper34 16
But it's a baby, all babies are worth it, right?
lyn87 7
You better hope you misheard her. If not, when all the dust has settled (congratulations btw :D) make sure she is reported. If you can't find who exactly did it, report the group of nurses you worked with u that day. I'm sure you can match up a face with the voice. Everyone has bad days...any other snarky comment would have been rude, but tolerable...but THAT one is not. She should not be working in that field.
Gilan 14
I'm sorry to hear that, but I'm not sorry for what I'm gonna say. That nurse is a bitch. FYL OP and congrats on the baby!
markr97 3
That is a very inappropriate thing to say.if I were you,if I didn't report her,I would have slapped her there and there.This are two peoples LIVES we are talking about..I hope you didn't keep your mouth shut about it tho.
MsFit 17
I hope you reported her. As a nurse, it's very common to use dark and distasteful humor to cope with the job, but it should NEVER be said where a patient or their loved ones could potentially overhear it. I have been appalled at things my patients or their loved ones have complained about my co-workers saying. I always encourage them to report it and will do it myself if necessary.
MTaylor00 8
She is obviously in the wrong profession if she feels the need to wish something like that upon someone just because things aren't going the way she wants it.
ChrisPo1992 7
******* smack that bitch!
pcw 1
**** that, report her she's a bitch and shouldn't be a nurse or working around women in labor or babies
OrganicSistah 17
I would've walked up to her and been like, "that's ****** up, where's your boss at?"
morganplindsey 2
that is so shitty of her. she should be fired