Today, my wife came back from her camping trip with her friends. I decided to help her out by unpacking her stuff while she used the bathroom. It's funny; I never knew that a dildo, a ball gag and an open pack of condoms were considered camping gear. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML
Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was packing for his annual hunting trip, I saw him slip a box of condoms into his bag. FML
Today, my girlfriend was packing for her study abroad program. Jokingly, I got her a pack of condoms. She laughed, saying "Oh yeah, I'll definitely need some of those." Later, I showed up to take her to the airport and saw her open suitcase in the kitchen, with the condoms on top. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who I've been dating for over a year, was going to Florida for a short trip with a few friends without me since I couldn't get work off. She asked me to put her iPod in her bag for her as she was almost ready to walk out the door. That's when I saw she'd packed 10 condoms with her. FML
Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML
Today, I came back from a hike to see my trailer rocking, as well as some strange but obvious noises coming from it. I went camping alone. Two strangers were in my camper having sex. FML
Today, I found three of my sister's dildos as I helped her unpack boxes for her new house. Jokingly, I said, "Why would you even need three?!" She actually explained. FML
Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML
Today, I found several thongs in the dryer that my wife has never worn before, purchased just days before she is going on vacation with her girlfriends. Serves me right for folding the laundry. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
The true survival kit. The ***** can be used as a grappling hook, the ball gag as a simple weapon, and the condoms to carry water.
Trinidad727 9
Sorry you had to find out that way...
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Comments (169)
Thoricsteam20 24
Bear Grylls would be proud.
slackerjoe 22
sounds like somebody's wife is FREAK!
sophsworldxo 10
Probably best to have a calm chat about it first instead of just jump to conclusions!
brandonc8892 13
Are you serious? There's no legitimate reason to have any of those things for a "camping" trip.
love_me_electric 20
82 - Why is there no good reason to have a ***** while camping? If I was going camping without my husband I'd probably bring a toy to keep me company. And putting a condom on a toy actually makes sense if you don't have clean water to wash it. I got nothing for the ball gag though.
deviousangel89 13
Someone's cheating... I'm so sorry you had to find out that way OP.
vikky538 29
If that ***** a glow in the dark then I say its most useful thing for camping.
Strajee 23
Lesbihonest, she isn't faithful
nutella4life 14
ouch. that's gonna be an awkward night...
lovelockdown23 23
Omg the more I read the more shocked I got. lol she went on a camping trip all right. pulled a couple all nighters, laid out under the stars, lol made love by the fire ahahah Geesh she foul
leogachi 15
No sympathy from you I see.
habibexpress 5
OP. FILL US IN!! I'm dying to read what happened next!!
Brilliant66star 17
Sorry you missed the invite, OP! Clearly, your wife brought the condoms so everyone could share -- most everything is harder to clean up when you're camping. The ball-gag was just because the girls were getting their BDSM on. In passing, two female friends of mine got married when it became legal here in Canada, but couldn't find a way to get divorced when they wanted to later. I have no idea what the law is like nowadays where you are, but you could be staying together. In that case, you may want to try opening your mind to some of your wife's ideas about sex. In a relationship, when one party won't give the other what they need, that party will usually find a way to take what they want. I wish you all the best, hoping you can make your marriage work. FYL.
leogachi 15
Why should they stay together? If they can't get a divorce then they would still be a couple legally, but that doesn't mean they have to keep living together and try to maintain a relationship that's lost its trust.