Today, my vegan girlfriend openly admitted that she'd let me die if she had to choose between saving my life or an animal's. She actually seemed confused as to why that upset me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by saying, "Good morning! We're going to be vegans from now on." FML
Today, I actually overheard the sentence, “People who can’t go vegan for medical reasons should die gracefully rather than eat an animal.” FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML
Today, my vegan step-mom found out I ate at McDonald's yesterday. She gave me hell and asked me how it feels to give money to "murderers". All while my dad sat quietly by because he's too whipped to speak his mind. It wasn't even her house a month ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend of five months told me that she had booked us reservations to our town's Halloween barbecue party. When I reminded her that I'm vegan, she told me she specifically got the reservations to help me to quit my "stupid fad". Weird, I never knew being a devout Hindu was a fad. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me the sauce he made for our dinner that was meat-based, trying to show me how nice meat is and stop me being a weirdo vegan. The reason I’m vegan is because my digestive system can’t handle animal protein. I’m writing this from the bathroom, vomiting myself to death. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML
Today, I noticed my sister's dog was very sick. One trip to the vet's later, the dog was diagnosed with gut problems caused by bad diet, and a life expectancy of about 3 months. I confronted my sister, who admitted she had the dog on the same vegan diet as her, to “save the planet.” Selfish hippie cow. FML
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Top comments
PSYqualiac 17
She was probably more concerned about the meat she doesn't eat. Sorry if my joke isn't kosher. I'm just hamming it up.
604 11
She just needs a hug. And bacon.
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Comments (110)
nialls_girl 13
That's messed up. Dump her!!
Gauzy21 12
Bitches!
lennonfan 7
I have been a vegetarian for about 6 months now, but I think all vegans are batshit crazy.
davincidasecond 24
And this is where you should probably think long and hard about whether you want someone like that as your girlfriend.
platinumbking 4
Wow Australia, Victoria? That's where I live
ThePols 11
That's when you tell her you'd save your Xbox before her in a fire.
sthrnbell 9
Dump her... Easy choice for you to make
orangeink25 3
that sucks man, dump her vegan arse and get a real woman
Oyas12 14
Ok, im ok with vegans not eaying or killing animals, but this... how many cats did/does she own?
mzgabbster 28
A lot of these comments are about how preachy and rude vegans are. How they always tell you what to eat, how to live your life, and are always ganging up to hate on people. Isn't that what most of you are doing to them? It seems a bit hypocritical. Eat what you want and don't be an ass.
Fou_Lou 20
Its actually not Hypocrisy. As long as you complain about the extrem Vegan anti meat behavoir and bitching people out for eating meat and stuff. Pointing that stuff out and saying thats not ok is quite fine. Because intolerant behavoir shouldnt be tolerated
mzgabbster 28
It's one thing to tell them that their behavior is intolerable, it's another to do the same exact thing that you find intolerable.