Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of more than two years told me in front of all of our friends that he'd trade me for some Playstation 3 games. I laughed it off because I thought he was kidding. He made it clear that he was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't feel like he loved me. His response? "Why else would I be with you? Your looks?" He was serious. FML
Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me, with complete confidence, that he's selected "drug dealer" as his career of choice. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a serious talk. He told me that I was a quick-tempered emotional train wreck. He then said, "You know how we talked about getting married? Now the only way I'd marry you was if hell froze over." He smiled, gave me a kiss, and went to bed. FML
Today, my pasty white boyfriend told me he intended to try and grow dreadlocks. FML
Today, when my boyfriend got home, I told him about how I’d had the worst day with our baby. Without blinking, he told me to say the word and he’d drive to a different city and anonymously surrender our son to a fire station and all our suffering would be over. He was completely serious. FML
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Top comments
SimpleSimon 0
"I wanna roll with, The gangstas, But oh, no, they all think I'm too white and nerdy"
infinityrhyme 0
Maybe he's thinking you'll support him and buy some bling too.
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Comments (302)
greenltrn2003 0
sit him down and have him watch this video http://www.metacafe.com/watch/329599/dave_chapelle_trading_spouses/ around the 3:10 mark.
littlemisslee 0
take him to Detroit and drop him off on 8 mile. it's not fun... my dad and I missed our exit and ended up having to go there one time. he locked the car doors while driving down and said, "Don't make eye contact with anyone, and we're not stopping at any red lights here..."
sexinmybed 0
this is a joke because it clearly states that you are a man. nice going.
ThinkingPunkLove 0
Cause hes a gay man Duuhhh!
happylittleman 0
Haha, because gay people can't be real, right?
Check_Mate 0
Really? ****! *fades*
trekkie44 0
sigh, so ignorant.
Marcus86 0
Thats what we call a douche bag.
alwaysalady 0
But why? I swear to God, it must be some sort of disease that affects you white suburban males. It infected both my brothers at one point. The cure: video tape them being "gangster" and replay it. They will be so embarrassed they never go backl
adamdrinkslots 0
Tell him how ******* rediculous that is at 'ijustwanttotellyou.com'
greenltrn2003 0
or he can be a man and tell him to his face
Jimboom 12
Get a gun and shoot him in the leg. See how he likes being gansta then. This is annoying as many who are part of gangs these days are not in it by choose. Many impoverished areas there is little choice for a young teen growing up. It's either live in your home (sometimes a very broken home), work real hard and live with the constant threat of being gunned down by a stray bullet or join a gang, make easy money and be the ones doing the shootings. For many children growing up without fathers they see a gang as the strong male figure they never had and so for them joining said gang becomes a no brainer. Add to that many families living in those areas can't afford to send their kids to college so their job prospects are limited. So again, to pay the bills they are forced to deal drugs and join a gang. While this is not the case for all gang members it happens more than you would like to think. So for a gayboy wannabe running around saying he wants to be "gangsta" is really a slap in the face to all those who say no to joining a gang and work hard to keep their kids in school and off the streets. Put this little fag in the getto, let him be passed around the homies like a blunt. Let him lose loved ones in a drive by and then lets see if he still wants to play being a gangster!
kira822_fml 0
Thanks a lot for submitting this one OP. Now it's turning into a racial/raciest thing.
gorgeous_chik7 2
Um...there are plenty of "white" gangsters out there in the world. Gangster doesn't equal "black" or "hispanic". It's a PERSON that chose to join an evil, rebellious group of people in search for "community" and family. As a matter of fact, I think it'd be safe to say there are actually more "white gangsters" in the world, because hypothetically the MAFIA is a gang - that's why back in the day they were called GANGSTERS. The Mafia is just a glorified version of a street gang that has more money and hides their crimes a lot better, therefore, they have more pull in society and government.
gorgeous_chik7 2
Um...there are plenty of "white" gangsters out there in the world. Gangster doesn't equal "black" or "hispanic". It's a PERSON that chose to join an evil, rebellious group of people in search for "community" and family. As a matter of fact, I think it'd be safe to say there are actually more "white gangsters" in the world, because hypothetically the MAFIA is a gang - that's why back in the day they were called GANGSTERS. The Mafia is just a glorified version of a street gang that has more money and hides their crimes a lot better, therefore, they have more pull in society and government. PS: Gang members come from all different kinds of backgrounds, including suburban neighborhoods. Bad kids are bad kids no matter where they live. The media has totally distorted the reality of what is really out there causing people to be ignorant and make ignorant comments. Gangs are in every neighborhood just like drugs are in every neighborhood. Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it doesn't exist.