Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of more than two years told me in front of all of our friends that he'd trade me for some Playstation 3 games. I laughed it off because I thought he was kidding. He made it clear that he was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't feel like he loved me. His response? "Why else would I be with you? Your looks?" He was serious. FML
Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me, with complete confidence, that he's selected "drug dealer" as his career of choice. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a serious talk. He told me that I was a quick-tempered emotional train wreck. He then said, "You know how we talked about getting married? Now the only way I'd marry you was if hell froze over." He smiled, gave me a kiss, and went to bed. FML
Today, my pasty white boyfriend told me he intended to try and grow dreadlocks. FML
Today, when my boyfriend got home, I told him about how I’d had the worst day with our baby. Without blinking, he told me to say the word and he’d drive to a different city and anonymously surrender our son to a fire station and all our suffering would be over. He was completely serious. FML
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Top comments
SimpleSimon 0
"I wanna roll with, The gangstas, But oh, no, they all think I'm too white and nerdy"
infinityrhyme 0
Maybe he's thinking you'll support him and buy some bling too.
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Comments (302)
jeremymg91 0
Wow that's stupid.
Proxgotsthafia 0
Hey! I'll have you know that being a gangster is an excellent way to go nowhere in life.
MrGlad 0
You don't see too many cacasion, gay gansters...nothing wrong with it I suppose, I mean being gay or cacasion...
HRNIII 1
If you can't spell caucasian then maybe you should just put white.
jeeeeenn 0
LMFAO! ahh lucky you
gueeterman 4
YDI BECAUSE YOUR GAY OP, ****** ******
SuperSpore 0
According to what it says, that would be true, though offensive. It says OP is a man, and he has a boyfriend.
car_razy 0
buy him an eminem cd for next holiday
FMLreactor 0
LMAO thats hilarious. Good luck with him
djmurph316 0
whoa, ur so right! way to make fun of someone for something they cant help that isnt even a big deal, 112!
Playthismelodyx3 0
lmao pretty whitty
F_E_Z_2_1_ 0
No worries!! Eminem is a white gangster perefect example!!! :)
qwertification 0
lol i was thinking the same thing
thebestapple 0
WTF, you have no right to say things like that, especially on a public website! If you don't like homosexuality, fine! But keep it to yourself, because nobody wants to hear your ******* insulting ranting! Being gay doesn't mean your a bad person, he's probably a better person than you, because you apparently have nothing better to do than sit around on your computer and make derogatory comments towards someone you don't even know! Being gay is just something that you are, you can't help it! And there's nothing wrong with it! I'm straight, but I'm sick of all you ******* morons making comments like this. There are some really nice, and amazing gay people out there. And this goes for all you homophobes, because I don't have time to go curse all of you off: **** off, mind your own business, and get a life!
vincee32 0
somebodys gay. #269. ******!
fsu69 0
i think 269's a fag and probly a ******
eminemXshady 0
273- Obvious troll is too obvious
btown1616 0
hey... everyone has a dream
farhil 14
269, "you have no right to say something like that, especially on a public website." Uh, what? That's the dumbest thing I've heard all day. It's a public website, he has EVERY right to say that. He shouldn't and it makes him look like an asshole, but he still had the right to.
LittleBastard 20
Actually, #295. Assuming he lives in the United States, "fighting words" and insults are not protected in the first amendment. So no. He has no right to insult him because the OP may or may not be a homosexual.
SocialAmethyst 20
I think the word your looking for is "Harrassment" and considering we have the rights to our own opinions. No matter how stupid. He can say whatever he wants. As he wasn't being specific.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
You can actually go one of two places once you become a gangster: jail or six feet underground.
infinityrhyme 0
Maybe he's thinking you'll support him and buy some bling too.
my_fml_account 2
he may have jungle fever
xTinyLovex 0
Nice job picking a winner, dude.
sjshark_29 2
Says the person with the duckface...
crudeandrudeguy 29
The hot duck face...
Bibblejomin 18
But she's actually pretty though...
sexy_chan 0
That's beyond lame. For both of you.
mojo_jojo 0
Not sure where the gangster = non-white thing came from, but you're right that it's kind of out of place in the suburban lifestyle. Try talking to him about it. I wouldn't be surprised if he feels like he needs to act tougher to compensate for any insecurities he may have.
reneetlovesyou 30
I agree, it bothers me quite a bit how people assume all gangsters are black or Mexican and that 'black' and 'ghetto' are synonymous. People tell me I "talk white," when I'm really just educated... Lol
1bored 0
Hahaha random!
SimpleSimon 0
"I wanna roll with, The gangstas, But oh, no, they all think I'm too white and nerdy"
TessIsabella 0
weird al yankovich, ftw :)
barroomhero 0
Best comment on here.
DangerousBabee 0
Lol a gay gangster..wow. If he goes to jail he'll drop the soap for sureee.
Youre_not_sorry7 2
LOL YES! haha love that song
stevenJB 25
The first original hardcore and still infamous gangsters were white.
TheDukee 0
Well... It's better than wanting to be a superhero :D
SchitzoFRIENDic 0
Well, if I could be a superhero, I'd be Ghetto Gangsta Guy! I'd walk around the streets shooting up wangstas trying to get high! Yay Stephen Lynch :) But you should play "I'm a Gangster" by Adam and Andrew everytime your boyfriend walks into the room xP
Bizzile 0
hahahahahahaha , my ex bf who is super adorable and preppy tried to go all G too.