Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of more than two years told me in front of all of our friends that he'd trade me for some Playstation 3 games. I laughed it off because I thought he was kidding. He made it clear that he was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't feel like he loved me. His response? "Why else would I be with you? Your looks?" He was serious. FML
Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me, with complete confidence, that he's selected "drug dealer" as his career of choice. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a serious talk. He told me that I was a quick-tempered emotional train wreck. He then said, "You know how we talked about getting married? Now the only way I'd marry you was if hell froze over." He smiled, gave me a kiss, and went to bed. FML
Today, my pasty white boyfriend told me he intended to try and grow dreadlocks. FML
Today, when my boyfriend got home, I told him about how I’d had the worst day with our baby. Without blinking, he told me to say the word and he’d drive to a different city and anonymously surrender our son to a fire station and all our suffering would be over. He was completely serious. FML
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Top comments
SimpleSimon 0
"I wanna roll with, The gangstas, But oh, no, they all think I'm too white and nerdy"
infinityrhyme 0
Maybe he's thinking you'll support him and buy some bling too.
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Comments (302)
aback 5
Aw...how sweet. He wants to be a wannabe.
curlyfriez 0
ha ha! you took the words out of my mouth!
zoombabwee 0
Uhhhh..... Wow lol
Lau_fml 0
Is he 15 and watches too much tv, too?
Essentials 0
Time to move on to someone a bit more mature. He's going to be referring to you as "his bitch" soon and will have "ho's" in his "posse".
irishdubr 0
Drop him off in QB and make him find his way home
arms_akimbo 0
Dump him. Do it.
Jazzywrites007 2
I'm officially following this FML's comments because this is all gonna get very racist verrrrrrry soon =))))
jkemp84 0
LMAO....Malibu's Most Wanted bitches!!!
Peroxide 3
That's awesome, get ur friend to pull a gun on him and watch him screem like a girl and wet his pants, GANGSTA!
augustdanielle 0
LMFAO!!! :D js