Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, not only is my son stupid enough to spend £50 on a bag of garden weeds because the dealer told him it was marijuana, he's also stupid enough to refuse to believe he was conned, and try to smoke it anyway. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, I drug tested my son for weed. He purposely filled the cup up to the top out of spite and I got piss all over my hands. Oh, and he failed. FML
Today, I found out what my son has been celebrating. Apparently, his boss caught him smoking weed and fired him, then had a massive stroke and now has the IQ of a potato, so my son just kept turning up to work since his boss hadn’t had the time to tell anyone he was fired, or to fill out any paperwork. My son is scum. FML
Today, after my close friend had his baby, he told me that he was no longer going to be selling weed at his house. I was happy for him, because it's unsafe. Until I found out he was still selling at my house with the help of my roommates, without telling me. FML
Today, it's my 18th birthday. I called my parents and they told me that they found weed in the guest house, so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say, "Happy Birthday." FML
Today, I found out that my son had sold his house key to one of his friends for half a packet of gum. Now there is someone out there who I have never met with full access to my house. My son is 16. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, I got a call from my brother, saying he was losing his mind at work and did not feel well. I went to pick him up. Turns out he decided to try weed for the first time at work and was high AF. Now I'm the little brother babysitting a 35 year-old man child. FML
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
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Top comments
mpkpm 19
I'll sell him some coke...$100..... Does he like diet or regular?
cats400 16
You need to teach him the difference
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Comments (78)
PrincessCastiel 27
Blaze it, man! Green is not a creative color
STEALTHHUNTER88 13
You have earned my upvote simply because of the reference!
bpickett18 16
...
LifeMD 14
Come on 93, let's get creative!
drewflav 17
Is your son a dwarf named "Dopey" by any chance?
fsomelife 26
Naw man, Dopey knew where to get his shit. Hence the name.
Wizardo 34
Maybe he was absolutely stoned on the gravel from the driveway...
idonotknow7 16
At least you know he's not experienced.
Warmonger_Smurf 29
Well at least he has the drive to do something. To bad he is so very very stupid.
alicealiveordead 13
Fantastic
darkfroggy 11
You can't fix stupid. :/
damnit1989 16
He knows the difference. He just didn't want to get caught selling lawn weeds and trying to pass it off as marijuana for money.
trashcan_man 16
So sad that it required this many responses before someone recognized what was going on.
grapefruit_hd 7
Agreed
VentiAnemoi 20
Maybe it was a prank...
igive 29
Keep an eye out on youtube, unless he didnt make it that far.
kingdomgirl94 29
95 you have scarred me and ruined my childhood.
TheGriizlyBear 22
Maybe he is a genius, making money selling weeds...
toasty_narwals 27
Sure until some angry customers track him down and him up for it.